


Lucifer's Vessel-Plan C

by daviesroyal



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Abandoned Work - Unfinished and Discontinued, Complete Derailment of Canon, I Don't Even Know, I blame my friends, Language, Multi, This is crack
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-01-06
Updated: 2014-04-03
Packaged: 2018-01-07 18:45:27
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 15
Words: 29,460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1123125
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/daviesroyal/pseuds/daviesroyal
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>With Nick burning out and Sam still saying no, Lucifer decides to look in a more...exotic place. Another reality, to be specific. He finds his would-be true vessel who actually consents. There's just one small problem: humans are more stubborn than he gave them credit for. Especially teenage girls.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I don’t own Supernatural. Technically, I don’t even own the OCs, cause they’re based off of my friends. I only own the idea.

*^*^*

_I looked around my bedroom, confused. No light shone through the gaps in the blinds, nor under the door. The clock froze at 12:34._

_A rustle of feathers had me whipping around. Who—_ what _—stood there had my mouth dropping in shock._

 _“You have_ got _to be joking,” I groaned. Okay, that settled it. No more watching_ Supernatural _right before I went to sleep._

_“I assure you, I am not—” Lucifer began._

_“Oh, shut it. I so didn’t want to deal with this. I have a test tomorrow morning, I need to_ sleep _. I know it’s a foreign concept for angels, but we mortal humans have to rest or we break. So bugger off.” I flopped back down on my bed, pulling the covers back over me in an attempt to fall back asleep. Or wake up. Or something._

_“You are special, and I need your help—” he tried again._

_“Oh, no. I don’t care if you are Satan, you don’t get to invade my mind and ask me questions in the middle of the night. Schedule an appointment.” I rolled to face the wall, not particularly caring if I was giving the Devil an opportunity to kill me. Seriously, why would he?_

_“Very well.”_

_I blinked, twisting my neck to see the empty room. Huh._

_Whatever, I could think in the morning. After I slept._

*^*^*

“Denise!”

“Rhiannon!”

I waited on the sidewalk as Denise hurried towards me. Her bag slung over her shoulder, her arms full of books, like usual, she grinned at me as we walked to Writers’ Club.

“So, think we’ll be kicked out of our room today?” She moved to open the door, ushering me in before following.

“Hopefully Roegner sorted everything out. Are you staying the entire time today?” I raised my eyebrows, the topic long a point of contention between us.

“I think so. Did you bring the writing sample?”

I shrugged. “Kind of. I wrote something a while ago—one of my abandoned fics. I think.”

Denise dropped her books on the desk, greeting Roegner, Abby and Joy before continuing our conversation. “You think? You can’t tell?”

“Well, I think it was fanfiction with one of my originals melded with it. I dunno, we’ll see. Hey, how are your premonitions?”

Denise sighed. “The same, pretty much. Is everything okay with you? You seemed kind of distracted today.”

“I don’t remember a lot of my dreams, but last night’s was really lucid—” I broke off, staring at the angel that had just appeared in the center of the room.

“Hey, what’s wrong? Déjà vu?” Denise clasped my shoulder worriedly. I shook my head.

“Nothing. The voices in my head decided to take a vacation in the real world.”

Everyone stared. “You are aware that made no sense, right?” Joy asked, amused.

“Hey, what’s up, who’s not making sense?” Mady slid into the room, setting her things down.

“Rhiannon,” Abby grinned.

“Oh, well, let me know when something new happens.” She turned to Joy. “What’s on the schedule for today?”

“You did ask me to schedule an appointment,” Lucifer laughed.

 _I didn’t mean while I was in public, you prick,_ I thought viciously. He laughed again. Good, I didn’t have to talk out loud.

“I told you, you’re special, I need your help.”

I ignored him.

“This isn’t my true form, you know—”

_I know._

A pause. Damnit.

“Do you now? That’s very interesting. How, is the question.” Lucifer leaned down to look me in the eyes. “Then you know what I’m here for?”

 _You need another vessel_. I had no sense of self-preservation, obviously.

“Very good.” Lucifer’s voice had dropped, becoming velvety smooth and soft. The Deceiver, I remembered.

_Oh, piss off. I’m not a child. Don’t treat me like one._

“Very well. But I need—”

 _My consent, I’m aware_. I was so screwed.

“Rhiannon?”

I barely looked up, frowning. “I’m having a conversation with the voices, give me a minute.”

It said a lot that that was an acceptable response. The meeting continued.

Who said he was actually here, anyway? He could just be a figment of my very overactive imagination.

Yeah, I was going crazy.

Er.

Still, if he wasn’t actually here…

_Fine. What the hell. Literally._

“Yes.”

Bright light filled the room and oh, _fuck_ , that was cold. I could feel Lucifer trying to push me out of the way, kill my soul.

_Oh, hell no, buddy, I was here first._

I could vaguely hear shouting, and I distantly hoped that everyone’s eyes were intact and inside their skulls. I didn’t push back Luce’s—oh, crap, I was already nicknaming the prick—Grace. I didn’t want him to find another poor sap, and Nick looked pretty bad. Then again, I didn’t want to be burned out. So I sort of… _meshed_ with him. I stubbornly held on until he (she?) was as much a part of me as I was of him. Her. Whatever.

It hurt. _Really fucking bad_.

We passed out.

*^*^*

_“WHAT DID YOU DO?” Huh. Luce was pissed._

_“Why are you asking me? Aren’t you the expert?” Okay, so I didn’t want him to start the End of Days. Call me old-fashioned, but I like things the way they are._

_“It’s impossible!” He glared at me, for some reason still wearing Nick, though without the degradation. Maybe that was a good thing. I didn’t feel like looking at my clone. Sam would be nice, though…_

_No. Bad thoughts. Apocalyptic ones._

_“Yeah, whatever you say. Obviously not as impossible as it was before, seeing as we’re in it.” I needed to wake up. I needed—_

_“You cannot contain me forever. I am too strong for you,” he told me smugly._

_I stared back, unimpressed. “If I burn out, how will you get back? How many vessels are even available to you now? I know Sam won’t say yes, not unless he’s planning to throw himself into the Cage and take you with him.”_

_Luce scowled. “I will not go back to Hell.”_

_I rolled my eyes. “Hey, I’m not sending you back unless you start unnecessarily killing people. Or cause natural disasters. Or—”_

_“Yes, yes, I get the point,” he said sullenly._

_“Good. Can we wake up now?”_

_Luce snorted. “Of course. It’s your decision, apparently.”_

_“Oh, don’t sulk. It doesn’t become you.”_

*^*^*

I opened my eyes to five worried faces inches from mine.

“Space, guys. It’s usually appreciated.” I sat up stiffly, the others scrambling back. I absently noticed Luce—still wearing Nick; seriously, what was up with that?—appear behind them.

“What happened, Rhiannon? That almost looked like…” Abby started nervously.

“Um…remember that conversation we had last Eighth Hour? About _Supernatural_ fics? And, uh, mine?”

Denise got it first. “Oh, Rhiannon, you didn’t.”

“What? I’m confused,” Joy said, exasperated.

“Yeah, I’m with Joy on this one,” Mady agreed, confused.

“No _way_ ,” Abby gasped. I grimaced.

“Will one of you explain what’s going on and let me know if an ambulance is needed?” Roegner raised an eyebrow.

“No ambulance. Straightjacket won’t do any good either. I sort of, maybe, kind of let Lucifer wear me?” I waited anxiously for their response.

“Then how are you still here?”

Trust Joy to skip shock and go straight to the heart of the problem.

“I’m stubborn?” That wasn’t supposed to sound like a question.

“One of the most stubborn humans I’ve ever had the displeasure of meeting,” Luce sniped from the whiteboard.

The rest of Writers’ Club whirled around. There may have been a couple of shrieks. I glared half-heartedly at his projection—it had to be a projection, it was the only thing that made sense, really.

“Rhiannon!” Denise, of course, went right to the scolding.

“Hey, it’s not my fault! Blame Satan over there!”

“Is he—?” Abby, that time.

“A projection. Easier than fighting for control over the mouth.” The smug bastard smirked at me.

“I have my very own Hallucifer, except everyone else can see him. Awesome.” Possibly in the original sense of the word. This sucked. I was so kicking God’s ass.

“So,” Mady broke the silence. “What now?”

I shrugged. “Plot development?”

Joy nodded. “Sure. Okay, let’s—”

“That’s it?” Luce stared at us incredulously.

“What, you want applause? Confetti? A parade?” I snarked at him.

He glared. Denise laughed. “It’s a worm! Eat it; I dare you to eat it! You have to eat it now.”

I grinned, finishing the quote. “I’m not going to eat it, that’s disgusting. I’m going to wear it, as a wormstache.”

Joy sighed fondly. “Back on track, guys. You can fangirl later.”

Luce stared on in horror. _What have I gotten myself into?_

I started. That wasn’t my thought…oh. No way.

 _Can I read your thoughts?_ I asked gleefully.

Luce vanished.

“Rude,” Denise huffed. “He didn’t even say goodbye.”


	2. Chapter 2

Luce was pissed. Again. This was nonnegotiable, though.

“Of course not. I have to go to school, it’s required. One, I’m a minor. Two, I’m not an all-knowing angel of the Lord—”

“ _Arch_ angel.”

“—and therefore actually have to learn. And I want to see my friends. School is a social thing too. You might learn something about humanity. Pay attention in Sociology,” I rambled, distracted. I shoved my books in my bag before heading downstairs. “Hey, mom.”

“Hi,” she replied, not looking up from her game of Candy Crush.

Luckily, not everyone could see Luce. He had appeared during dinner the previous night, but none of my family had reacted. Apparently, only those exposed to his raw Grace, like the Club had been, could perceive him. If any of his brothers showed up, though, I would be in trouble.

“They won’t. It took me enough energy to jump realities at all, more to do it discretely. No one knows I’m here, and I’ll have to recharge before returning.”

_Wait, returning?_ I made sure not to speak out loud in front of my mother. Engrossed in her game or not, she would be confused as to who I was talking to.

“Of course. I must go back at some point. I’m not going to resume the Apocalypse,” he added irritably at my expression, “but Hell and Heaven don’t know that.”

_I’d be more concerned about the Winchesters._

“Why?”

_Like I said, your family has a nasty habit of underestimating humans. Castiel went against his family, knowing he was going to die. All for the Winchesters. Well, Dean, but that’s a whole other can of worms._

“That was one seraph—”

_Who was then brought back to life by God._

Luce didn’t answer. I glanced around, noting his physical (metaphysical? Spiritual?) absence.

_Luce?_

_Here._

I blinked. _Okay. Why?_

_What is this beverage?_

I stared down at my mug.

_It’s called hot chocolate. Traditionally, it’s made by melting chocolate pieces and sugar together, and then mixing them into warm milk. Now, it comes in packets._

_It’s…amazing. Better than the drinks we had in Heaven._

_Yeah, I guess your family has a sweet tooth—once they try it, that is._

_What do you mean?_

_Well, Gabriel’s always munching on some form of candy—_

_You know where Gabriel is?_

I paused, taking in the excitement and longing I could feel. Luce and I were so closely bonded that we couldn’t hide much from each other.

_Not…exactly. I mean, I know where he is at certain points, but—_

_How?_

_Luce—_

_He’s my brother. Please._

I winced. Luce never pleaded. This wasn’t going to end well.

_I don’t know, Luce. No, listen to me,_ I insisted when he tried to interrupt. _The things I know, how I know them—it’s not nearly as simple as you think it is. How I know who you were, what you wanted, from the very beginning? This kind of knowledge, it depends on our actions, on how much is changed, on what is changed. We go screwing with that, there’s no telling what will happen. Now, some things I’m all for changing, but we have to be careful, Lucifer. We have to take this one day at a time. And today, we need to go to school._

Luce was silent for a long moment. _Fine._

I blinked, grabbing my bag and getting out of the car—and when had we even gotten to school?—before replying. _What, for real?_

_You called me Lucifer. You haven’t done that since you said Yes. I won’t stop asking, or pushing, but I’ll drop it for now._

I exhaled deeply. _Thank you, Luce._

_Anytime. Anything. You are my vessel._

_Dude, no. You’re my angel._

I grinned as I opened my locker, Luce leaning on the wall next to it. “That’s true. But I am correct also.”

“Yeah, you keep telling yourself that, Feathers.” I shut the door, shouldering my bag and heading to the Commons. I spotted Denise at our table and dropped into the seat across from her. Luce loomed over me. I craned my neck to look up at him.

“You could sit down, you know,” I said mildly, ignoring the looks I was getting from the next table’s occupants. Denise rolled her eyes.

“Why is your muse in the physical world, again?” Trust Denise to have a cover story. Everyone just ignored the crazy artists and writers, instead of sending them to padded rooms. Not that it would matter, we’d just break out again.

“Because he wanted a vacation from my head.”

“I would too. What are we talking about?”

I twisted in my seat. “Hey, Emily. My muse.”

“Your muse? Is that some sort of writer thing?” She asked skeptically.

“More or less. Luce decided to play in the real world.”

“The one from your story?” She looked a little more interested now.

“You wrote a story about me?” Luce sounded ecstatic. I groaned.

“Shut it, you,” I mumbled half-heartedly.

“Are you going to talk to Schweikhard today?” Denise asked.

I sighed. “I probably should. Beatty doesn’t want me to drop it, of course—”

“Drop what?” Luce was confused.

“Spanish,” Denise and I said at the same time.

“Why would you drop Spanish?” Evidently we didn’t clear things up at all. I turned to look at him, his head cocked.

“It’s times like this where you can really see the family resemblance,” I told Denise dryly. “I don’t have time for Spanish right now, with everything else going on, so I’m dropping the class.”

“Why?” Luce persisted. “I mean, why the language? Why not another class?”

“Because my other classes are really interesting, and I’ve spent three years on Spanish. I might pick it up again, I don’t know.” I shrugged and turned back.

“You don’t have to. It should be as easy as breathing now.”

Now I was the confused one. “What? Why?”

**“Because you’re my vessel. I am a natural translator.”** He sounded ridiculously proud of that fact.

**“What, really? That’s handy. How’s that work?”** He simply smirked and nodded at me. **“What? Come on, I know the rest of your family’s allergic to straight answers, but this is ridiculous. I thought you were supposed to be the black sheep?”**

“Uh, Rhiannon?” I turned to Denise again, absently noting that others were staring at us. Not that I cared.

“Yeah?” I was frustrated. This was not how I wanted to start my morning.

“I don’t think you need to drop Spanish anymore.” She started sniggering.

“What? Why? Didn’t you hear me?” She laughed harder.

“Rhiannon, I think the entire cafeteria heard you having a conversation with thin air—in Spanish.”

I blinked. “What?” I spun around. “ _What?_ ”

Luce was _still_ smirking, damn him. Oh, wait…I shook my head, trying to get back on track. “How’s that work then? Someone says something in another language, I automatically respond in kind?”

“Basically, yes. I’m very good at math, as well. Though your history could use some work.” His face twisted in disgust as I rolled my eyes.

“Shut up, we do our best. Are we going?” I added to Denise. She nodded, still laughing, and we stood to make our way to the math building.

The day passed mostly without incident, apart from Luce disparaging several of the topics in my classes. It was at lunch when Luce discovered Eighth Hours. He’d heard of them yesterday, of course, but didn’t really understand.

“Basically, we have a shortened day of classes, allowing for an extra hour at the end of the school day. It’s mostly for teachers to have meetings, or catch up on work, but the students either use it as a study hall, a socializing period, or an early release. I usually go to the cafeteria to see my friends I don’t usually see during the day.”

Catty corner to me at our lunch table, Emily rolled her eyes. “She’s been doing this all day. It’s her muse, or something, from her story. You know, the one about—”

“Hey, it’s rude to ignore people when they’re talking to you. Mostly. Sometimes it’s justified,” I cut in before Emily could finish. I’d work on the story later. Eventually. Maybe. I felt kind of weird writing about Luce when he was sharing my body and in my head. Besides, he probably would be insulted.

“I’m going to need to read this story of yours. It sounds amusing,” Luce said, grinning mischievously.

I grimaced. “It’s nowhere close to finished, and it’s not supposed to be amusing,” I muttered, sullen. I didn’t like being laughed at, even if Luce didn’t mean it maliciously, but I hated having my work mocked. I loved writing, and while not everyone is a fan, I really didn’t fancy having one of the main characters read it.

I was also really grateful that we stayed out of each others’ heads unless absolutely necessary. Once I figured out I could read Luce’s thoughts if I wanted to, we came to a truce about the mind reading.

Luce didn’t answer, but I caught him frowning out of the corner of my eye.

I probably should have thought through the whole school thing before I let Luce meet Denner. That…was not one of my finer ideas.

“I _like_ him,” Luce said, awed. He seemed shocked that he was capable of feeling anything but disgust or hatred for a human. Vessels and my friends exempted, apparently.

“Of course you do,” I sighed. Predictably, Denner noticed.

“Rhiannon, stop talking to yourself, it’s distracting.”

“I’m not talking to myself, I’m talking to Lucifer,” I replied. Huh. My brain-to-mouth filter was broken again.

“What, the Devil?” Lexi asked, leaning towards me from the front table she was sitting on. Luce raised an eyebrow at the antipossesion tattoo on her chest.

“The one from five that I said Yes to, yeah. Don’t flip,” I added at her open mouth.

“You said Yes to Satan and you’re still here? Damn, girl.” She was either impressed or making fun of me. Luce was sticking his tongue out at her. His forked tongue. I stared.

_Tell me that isn’t going to happen to me,_ I pleaded.

“Of course not. This is a projection; I can change its appearance at will. You could probably change yours as well, since you have access to my Grace.” Luce rolled his eyes at me. Typical.

My eyes narrowed. I focused, trying to find the sensations I’d had during our merging. The cold flooded my being for a second before I pushed an infinitesimally small part at Lexi. She jumped as it washed over her, and then squeaked as Luce shimmered into her view.

“Holy horse crap!” She bolted for the back of the room.

“I told you,” I called smugly.

“Not cool, dude. Seriously not cool. A little warning next time, okay?” Lexi looked a little wild around the eyes.

I shrugged. “No need. Once is enough.”

She stared at me, and then threw up her hands. “Whatever. I’m just going to focus on the awesomeness of this situation instead of the wrongness.”

I nodded. “Probably wise. It’s what I’ve been doing.”

We turned back to our books, letting the rest of the class pull themselves together. I smirked slightly. That was _fun_.

Spanish was a breeze, as promised. I assured Mr. Beatty that I no longer needed to drop his class, smiling at the pure relief on his face. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad.


	3. Chapter 3

Eighth Hour started out well. Abby and Denise were there, conversing in a way that included Luce without looking too insane. Margaret, Bill, and Elizabeth weren’t able to see him, of course, but we were all used to the strangeness of our group. It lasted for about half an hour, and then Luce vanished abruptly, tugging on our link. I frowned and tried to ask him what, exactly, he was planning on doing.

_The Winchesters have trapped something in holy fire—something that doesn’t feel like an angel at all._

What the hell? How could Luce even—no, wrong question. What did the Winchesters have trapped— _oh_.

Crap.

Reaching out, I grasped Denise and Abby’s forearms tightly, knowing they’d never forgive me if I left them behind. I gave in to the pulling.

The three of us—Luce was still hiding, and understandably so—in a very familiar derelict warehouse that was currently hosting two angry hunters, a beat-up angel, and an archangel trapped in holy fire.

Awesome.

Which reminded me, I still needed to find God and kick his ass…

Both girls inhaled sharply.

“Merry Christmas. Or Happy Birthday. Whatever, find a holiday you like. Hello, saviors of earth.” I waved to the Winchesters and Castiel, not looking at Gabriel. That would make me lose my cool, which would end messily.

“Hey, bro. Or is it sis, now?” Gabriel was determined to be a jackass. Great.

“Neither,” I said calmly, turning to face him now. “The name’s Rhiannon. Luce is ignoring me. I think he’s sulking ‘cause I brought my friends along for the ride. How did you know he’s with me, anyway?” I tilted my head, using our bond to imitate Luce as closely as possible.

Gabriel didn’t lose the smirk, but his eyes were sharp and calculating. “You weren’t as subtle jumping back as you were leaving. I’m betting even Heaven felt the waves your Grace made. Michael’s probably on his way right now.”

“Wait,” Sam interrupted, sounding desperate. I looked back to him. “You’re Lucifer? I thought you were wearing a guy, Nick?”

I scowled. “I’m not Luce, buddy. And Nick was a little worse for the wear. Unfortunately, I wasn’t the perfect solution. I would have been his true vessel if he was actually from my reality, but as a result, we sort of…meshed. Both in this body, in my mind, and his Grace and my soul are bonded so tightly that it will never separate.”

I had no clue where these words were coming from, but they felt right. I tried to use said bond again to find Luce, but he shied away. I sighed—again—and focused on the current situation.

The current situation being a shitload of angels, headed by Michael, arriving in true dramatic Heavenly fashion.

“Lucifer—” Michael growled, Zachariah hovering just behind him.

I snapped. “No! For the _last fucking time_ , I am not Lucifer! I am his vessel, yes, but that doesn’t mean I’m gone, you winged pricks! At least have the decency to ask who you’re fucking talking to before leaping to conclusions! And seriously, I am so ready for this day to be over, and I really _do not fucking need this right now_. And— _Damnit, Luce, will you get back here?”_ I crossed my arms and scowled heavily, giving any angel that moved the Glare of Ultimate Mass Destruction™.

Luce appeared two inches behind me, flinching slightly at the sudden motions of everyone else except for Gabriel and us going for their weapons. I narrowed my eyes, prepared to defend my angel, when—

“Oh, _honestly_ ,” Denise snapped, stepping forward. “Are you all so stubborn and _stupid_ that you can’t even tell whether he’s a threat or not? Luci isn’t going to do anything, why would he? He doesn’t want to fight you, you’re his _family_. He’s sworn off the apocalypse; the only ones still gunning for it are you and _Hell_. The only reason he even came back was to help his _brother_ , just like older siblings _should_.” She glared viciously at the suitably cowed angels, Abby and I grinning behind her. Luce, Castiel, and the Winchesters looked kind of shell-shocked, and Gabriel…had his poker face on.

“Your Father would be ashamed— _no, you don’t get to talk right now_.” She turned on Zachariah, who had opened his mouth to defend his actions. “He created angels to love, and protect, and guide, not destroy it all in a temper tantrum because you’re upset Daddy’s gone on vacation. If I had kids like you, I’d want a little Me-time, too. Did you ever actually think about what He would want, or did you just paraphrase your desires into orders from Him? Destroying Earth and humanity goes against everything you’re supposed to stand for, but the moment you’re unsupervised, you get drunk on power and throw an End of Days party. Pathetic,” she finished bitterly. Denise took a deep breath. “Okay, feel free to smite me now.”

“Oh, _hell_ no. No one’s smiting anyone,” I said quickly, moving to stand beside her, Abby coming up on her other side and Luce flanking me. “Which reminds me—” I raised my head and whistled at the sprinklers. Water poured down, soaking us in seconds. More importantly, it soaked the circle of holy fire still surrounding Gabriel.

“Hey, Luce, I found your brother,” I tossed carelessly over my shoulder. When surrounded by homicidal angels and paranoid hunters, I find it best to pretend not to care and act as casual as possible.

Hey, it worked with Luce.

“Yes, I’m aware. Has anyone ever told you you’re a bit of an overachiever?” Luce retorted faintly. I hope we didn’t break him.

“It’s been said. Now what? Do we stare at each other for the rest of eternity?” I looked pointedly at Michael and the rest of the feather dusters.

Dean snorted. “Hell no. I’m outta here. Sam? Cas?”

“Yeah, I’m coming Dean,” Sam affirmed, glancing over at our group one last time before turning to follow his brother. Cas hesitated, and then followed the Winchesters. Like he always would.

I looked at Gabriel, only to find him staring at me again.

“What? Is there something on my face?” I’ve had a long day, I’m allowed to be snippy. Shut up.

Gabriel tilted his head. “Why did you say Yes to my brother?”

Everyone froze. I looked at Gabriel for a long moment. “Why not?”

He raised an eyebrow. “Luci here doesn’t exactly have a good rep with you humans. Why would you help him?”

Everyone waited for my answer, even my friends. “Because he was hurting. Because I saw a creature in pain that needed my help, and if I had the slightest chance of saving him, and maybe the rest of the world while I was at it, why the hell _wouldn’t_ I take it? No one is beyond redemption, not if they’re willing to try.”

I don’t think anyone even breathed for the agonizing seconds after I finished my speech. Eventually, Sam broke the silence.

“I...never really thought about it that way,” he whispered. I smiled gently at him.

“I know. But you do now, and that’s what counts. Besides, I’m kind of glad you didn’t. I wouldn’t have met Luce otherwise.” I turned to grin at him.

Luce was staring at me like...like I was the angel and he was the atheist whose faith had just been revitalized. It made me uncomfortable. Why was he looking at _me_ like that? I didn’t deserve that, not from him.

_No one’s ever stood up for me like that before,_ his voice echoed in my mind, full of wonder and something else, something tender. _No one’s ever thought I was worth saving before. I was right when I said you were special, but I never realized how much until now._

_Luce, I’m only human. Stubborn, and too curious for my own good, and maybe a little insane, but I’m nothing special, nothing unique, not really._

_You are. I called you my vessel before, but you’re much more than that. You‒_

“So, how are we going to get back home?” I asked out loud, desperate for Luce not to finish his sentence. That was straying dangerously close to territory I had no business being in, especially not with Luce.

“We’re not staying for a while?” Two horrified faces stared back at me. I groaned. As much as I was immune to the puppy eyes, disappointing my friends was something I wasn’t prepared to deal with, especially after the day I had. I caught Abby sneaking glances at Sam, Denise doing much the same with Castiel.

Awesome. Well, I could always play matchmaker.

Yeah. That could work.

“We have school in the morning, guys. We can’t stay indefinitely.”

“Wait, let me get this straight. You let Lucifer wear you, but you’re still going to school? _Why_?” Dean stared at me incredulously.

“ _Thank_ you,” Luce spoke up fervently. Dean glared at him, but I didn’t let him retaliate.

“Shove off. I happen to like school, and I want to see my friends. Deal with it. And stop antagonizing each other,” I added, pointing at each of them. “Act your age, instead of preschoolers fighting over who gets the yellow crayon.”

“Do we have to stay in the warehouse? Because if not, I’d rather move somewhere more comfortable,” Abby broke in, rolling her eyes.

“Sure thing, cupcake,” Gabriel smirked. He clicked his fingers before anyone had time to stop him.


	4. Chapter 4

The archangels, the humans, Cas, and the Impala all ended up in the Singer Auto Salvage Yard, staring down the double barrels of a shotgun. The other angels that had accompanied Michael were…elsewhere.

“Hey, Bobby. They followed us home, can we keep them?” Dean smirked at the semi-retired hunter that was the Winchesters’ second father.

“Only if they pass the tests and you promise to take care of them,” he snarked back.

“Oh, yay, tests,” I deadpanned.

“Don’t worry, Rhiannon, they’re not going to make you think,” Denise consoled me.

“No, they’re just going to cut me up and be rude‒Hey, do you have any Borax?” I changed subject abruptly. Don’t look at me like that, we needed to be prepared.

“Why do you need the Borax now?” Abby asked.

“Better safe than sorry. And I feel like being a mad scientist,” I told her before just zapping into the kitchen. Cleaning supplies, cleaning supplies...must be in the basement. Hah, found them.

“Why do you need the Borax, exactly?” Luce appeared behind me, bemused.

“Leviathan are allergic to it,” I said distractedly.

“ _Leviathan_?” Maybe I shouldn’t dump so many surprises on him at once. I didn’t want to find out if an angel could go into shock.

“Eventuality that we need to be prepared for. It’s not paranoia if they actually are out to get you,” I informed him briskly, bounding up the stairs instead of flying.

“A concept I’m sure is a core hunter value,” he remarked dryly. “They are locked away in Purgatory, you know.”

I ignored the hunters gathered in the sitting room, making my way to the kitchens. “Yeah, okay. Better safe than sorry. Oh, cool, you have blessed pipes,” I called to Bobby.

“You better not be screwing with my kitchen, girl,” he barked through the door.

“Relax, I’m updating your security.” I coated the Borax in Grace, telling it to pour on any Leviathan that breached the perimeter. While I was at it, I corrected his wards to keep out any angels not currently on the property or approved by myself, Castiel, or the hunters.

“Okay, you’ve got fancy new Keep Out signs,” I told him, plopping down next to Denise on the couch. I rolled my eyes at the sawed-off still aimed at me.

“Seriously? You know that won’t do anything, right?” I glanced disdainfully at the barrel.

“Might not be permanent, but it’ll sting like a bitch,” he scowled. Clearly the Winchesters had filled him in on who we were. Or at least as much as they knew.

“It’ll also make a mess, and I refuse to clean it up for you. Now, do we actually have a plan, guys?” I turned to the girls. “Cause I don’t think Mr. Singer‒”

“Christ, girl, just call me Bobby. None of this ‘Mr. Singer’ crap. I’m not that old. Idjit.”

I shrugged. “Fine. But we really can’t freeload, guys. I didn’t really have a plan coming in.”

“There’s a surprise,” Denise deadpanned.

“Hey, blame the Devil, he dragged us here,” I sulked.

“ _You’re_ Satan,” Dean sneered.

My eyes flashed. I stood up slowly, shaking off my friends’ hands on my arms. “You know,” I said softly, “I believe we’ve already had this conversation. _I_ am not Lucifer. I am Rhiannon. I am also getting really tired of your shit. I’ve been dragged across the universes, had to avert the Apocalypse for you, and for some reason, I’m helping you clean up messes you haven’t even made yet. So tell me,” I stopped inches from Dean, refusing to be intimidated by his size. “If you keep pushing your luck, exactly how long do you think my patience will last? Me, I think I’m near the end of my rope. So back off, and _shut your fucking mouth_. Okay?”

I smiled at the end. It wasn’t a nice smile.

Dean swallowed.

Bobby laughed. “You’re not Satan, that’s for sure. You’re way more terrifying. You should start grovelling now, ya idjit,” he added to Dean.

The younger hunter gaped at him. “What? Why‒”

“Dude, seriously. Just do it,” Sam urged. He was obviously wise in the ways of women.

“Dean, I believe it would be advisable‒” Cas began.

“Alright, alright, fine! I’m sorry, okay?” He glared at me, flushed.

I grinned brightly at him. “Okay. So.” I spun back to my friends. “Plan?”

* * *

 

“This is a stupid plan.”

I was sulking in the backseat of the Impala, squished between Gabriel and Luce. Denise was in the passenger seat, Castiel in the middle of the bench. Sam drove one of Bobby’s trucks behind us with Abby and Balthazar, who had shown up shortly after we’d left the salvage yard.

“We don’t have a better one, and the Winchesters didn’t want us unsupervised,” Luce explained patiently. It didn’t make me feel better.

“Why are you here then?” I asked Gabriel crossly. “It’s not like they could make you stay.”

Gabriel pouted at me. Denise twisted in her seat. “Why do you want him to leave? I thought he was your favorite angel?”

I blushed brightly and glared at her. “You want to sit back here between the two rebel archangels, be my guest. If not, bugger off.”

“I’m your favorite angel?” Gabriel was delighted, of course. Luce was not.

“I thought I was your favorite angel?” He looked both murderous and like a kicked puppy.

“Woah, hey, I’m not picking favorites! I like you both, okay? Relax.”

I really didn’t like the calculating glint in Luce’s eyes. “How much?”

I looked at him blankly. “What?”

“How much do you like us?”

I gaped at him. “What are you, _twelve_? I’m not in middle school anymore, and I didn’t play that game even when I was. Don’t involve me in your pissing contest.” I sat back, crossing my arms and glowering at the back of Denise’s head. This was all her fault.

“And don’t screw with my car. Archangels or not, I will make you pay,” Dean threatened, glaring at them in the rearview mirror.

Cas shifted uncomfortably in front of me. Yes, Gabriel had just stuck him in TV Land, and he probably wasn’t too comfortable around Luce either, but really. As if I would let them hurt anyone. Well, anyone who didn’t deserve it.

“At least she cares about me enough to convince others of my innocence,” Luce said smugly.

I groaned. This was going to be a long drive.

Where were we even going?

“Hey, Dean‒” I started, leaning forward.

“Chuck,” Denise answered.

“Oh, okay.” I leant back.

Dean gave us a suspicious glance. “Are you reading each others’ minds?”

“No,” we said at the same time.

“She let _me_ in, not‒”

I reached over and twisted both of their ears. “If you two don’t _shut it_ right this second‒”

“Enough!” Dean shouted over me. “No one talks for the rest of the drive!” He jabbed the dashboard, ‘Highway to Hell’ ringing out moments later. He gritted his teeth and slammed the music off again. The car descended into awkward silence that wasn’t broken until several hours later.

Dean parked the Impala in a long line of similar cars, Sam pulling in next to him. The Winchesters clambered out frantically, Denise and Abby following while the angels simply zapped out. I could barely contain my excitement.

“Hey, guys, is this‒?”

“Yep.” Denise smirked at my expression. “Um, should we be bringing this many angels?”

“I’m not leaving,” Gabriel and Luce immediately protested, glaring at each other the next second. I huffed and rolled my eyes. This was very quickly moving from endearing to annoying.

“I feel I should also stay,” Cas rumbled. The _with Dean_ went unsaid but was heard by all. Well, all but the hunter himself.

“What, and miss this?” Balthazar grinned maniacally. “Not a chance.”

“Fine. Then can we go? Our guides have already started the tour without us.” Abby gestured to the fast-retreating backs of the Winchester brothers. We jogged to catch up.

“Chuck! There you are!” Sam called. The rest of the group trailed behind the two hunters.

“Guys?” Chuck looked shocked, and a little terrified.

“What’s going on?” Dean really didn’t like small talk. And Luce had disappeared again.

_It’s Him. It’s been millenia, and He’s hiding as much as possible, but I’d know my Father anywhere._ Luce sounded like a child again, lost and scared and full of grief.

That was _so_ not on.

I stepped forward, interrupting Chuck’s stammering explanation and ignoring the rather alarmed looks my friends were sporting. “You.”

Chuck looked ready to piss Himself. “Um, I can explain?”

I smiled sweetly. “No need. I know everything I have to. And you are going to get Your Divine Ass kicked into the next timestream.” He was stumbling back now. I didn’t stop.

“Wait, that’s God?” Abby sounded kind of strange.

“Oh yes,” I growled. The angels all inhaled sharply. They did know they didn’t have to breathe, right?

“Good,” she said, before shoving past me. I halted, wary.

“You,” Abby began, “are a selfish, cowardly, self-absorbed bastard. You created angels and humans. _knew_ there was trouble because of it, and refused to do anything about it! You ran away like a child who broke His mother’s favorite vase and hoped to avoid the consequences. You didn’t even bother to help when Your youngest son was _begging_ You to come back.”

Chuck tried to defend Himself. “It was‒”

“So help me, if the next words that come out of Your mouth are ‘all part of the plan,’ I will skin Your nether regions and force-feed them to You.” God shut His mouth with a click.

“I’ll do that anyway,” I chipped in cheerfully.

Abby ignored me. “I’m aware of the concept of ‘shoving baby birds out of the nest,’ but when innocent people are suffering and dying because You are too scared and ashamed to admit You made a mistake, actions do not speak louder than words. You need to actually talk to your family. Explain things. Communicate. I’ll even sign You up for the therapy sessions.” She crossed her arms over her chest and glared at Chuck, who was shaking slightly. I could feel Luce’s shock and awe of her. It was practically the look on Sam’s face, minus the beginnings of a crush.

“So, are we still doing the convention thing? Cause that would be brilliant.” Denise tilted her head at the door‒just as Becky Rosen appeared.

I muffled my ears preemptively.

“SAM!” I think one of the windows of the hotel cracked. “You made it!”

_That sound is_ not _supposed to come from a human being_. Luce sounded both horrified and fascinated.

“No playing mad scientist. And get out here, I refuse to talk to you unless I can see you.”

“Shouldn’t you specify if anyone else can see him?” Balthazar smirked.

I shrugged. “I don’t actually care if anyone thinks I’m crazy, as long as I know I’m not. It feels a lot saner if he’s manifest.”

“You feel saner if you’re talking to Satan out loud instead of in your head?” Dean had given up on antagonizing me, and had promptly started teasing me at every opportunity. He was worse than Victor.

“Hey, you all can see him. It makes me feel better.” We followed the others inside.

“Should we just leave them to it?” Denise wondered.

“Why not? They’re big boys, they can take care of themselves. I have a feeling we’ll need to keep an eye on the celestials anyway,” I said, glancing at said celestials. Chuck was up on the stage, answering questions, while the angels sat in the back row with us. The Winchesters and Becky stood behind us, alternatively giving us wary looks and glaring at Chuck.

“You’re all going to find out. Thanks to a wealthy Scandinavian investor, we’re going to start publishing again.” The room erupted into cheers and applause. I leaned forward and glared at Gabriel.

“What?” he protested. “Messenger, remember? The Gospel is _supposed_ to be read. Can’t read it if it’s sitting in a memory drive.”

I rolled my eyes and filed out into the hotel lobby. “The wonderful thing about computers? They’re connected to the internet. And they can be hacked. Why don’t you just blog them or something?” I added, coming up behind Chuck.

He jumped about two feet into the air. “Can you _not_ do that?” He yelped, turning.

I smirked. “I can sneak up on God. Think I should add that to my resumé?”

“No,” Abby said mildly.

“Okay. So, what‒”

“Excuse us,” Dean snapped. Not waiting for an answer, he turned on Chuck. “In case You haven’t noticed, our plates are kind of full right now. Finding the Colt, hunting down the forces of Hell. We don’t have time for this crap.”

“Hey, I didn’t call you!” Chuck immediately protested.

“He means the books, Chuck. Why are You publishing more books?” Sam explained, at least trying to sound patient.

“Look, guys, as much as I hate to admit it, Gabriel is right,” I said wearily.

“Why would you hate to admit that?”

“The Gospels need to be available. Just look on the bright side. You have fans!” I grinned.

Dean and Sam stared at me. “How is that the bright side?” Dean snapped.

I rolled my eyes. “Dude, what the hell did you think _we_ were?” I asked incredulously. “If we were normal, there’s no way we’d be taking everything so well. Never underestimate the powers of the fans. It brought Gabriel back to life.”

“I never actually died, you know,” he said petulantly.

“Spoilers,” I told him gleefully.

“You’re enjoying this way too much,” Denise said dryly.

“Probably,” I agreed. “Hey, is Balthazar trying to get Cas drunk?”

Dean, Sam, Denise, and Abby all immediately headed to the bar to prevent whatever disaster was imminent.

“Well, that’s one way to get rid of them,” Luce remarked.

“No supervision by the responsible ones. Quick, let’s go while they’re distracted.” I grabbed Luce and Gabriel, dragging them to the other side of the room as a scream echoed from upstairs. “The game is afoot. Let’s go eat.”

“Eat where? They don’t serve much here,” Luce said doubtfully.

“Yeah, but we can fly anywhere in the world, eat, and be back before dark. We just have to be mindful of timezones.” I scanned the room again, making sure the others in our group were still distracted, before flying to‒

“Disney World, really?” Gabriel asked skeptically. “You couldn’t be original?”

“Epcot,” I corrected, beelining for Britain. “And since London itself is close to midnight, Epcot is the next best thing. One order of fish and chips, please,” I added, leaning against the window of the stand. I discreetly conjured money and thanked the guy.

I juggled the basket and my phone, shooting off a quick text to let Denise know we were just at Disney World. I turned my phone off hastily and slid onto a bench. Gabriel and Luce sat on either side.

I stared down at my napkins. A ten digit number was scrawled on the top one‒which promptly burst into flames. I raised my eyebrow at it.

“You know, I kind of need those,” I said mildly.

“Not that one,” Luce immediately replied, glaring hotly at the guy.

I rolled my eyes. Again. “You’re overreacting.”

“No, he’s not.” Gabriel joined in on the glare-fest.

I huffed. “Stop it, he didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, I’m flattered. Not many people try to flirt with me, you know.”

“I can flirt with you all you want,” Gabriel said, shifting gears lightning fast. Just as quickly, Luce shifted his glare to Gabriel.

“Alright, enough. Both of you, play nice. Gabriel, stop antagonizing Luce. Luce, stop trying to defend my virtue. I can do that myself just fine. Now,” I stood, stuffing the last fry in my mouth. “Let’s go back before Denise convinces Cas or Balthazar to bring her to fetch us.”


	5. Chapter 5

We appeared in the corner of the auditorium, right next to Sam, Denise, Abby and the Gore actress. The latter let out a little shriek, while the others just glared at us.

“What? I was hungry,” I defended. “What’s going on?”

“Look, if she doesn’t want to act, then one of us can do it,” Abby suggested.

“Woah, woah, woah, hold up,” I demanded. “You want to go up against three bloodthirsty little ghosts? They’ll scalp you!”

“No, they won’t. We’re good enough. It’s just like Macbeth,” Denise pointed out reasonably.

Screw reason. “Macbeth was a play, this is real life! You guys could die!”

“We can take care of ourselves, Rhiannon,” Abby said softly.

My jaw clenched. “I know, I just—”

“Hate feeling helpless?” Denise smiled softly. I scowled and nodded jerkily.

“I’ll be fine. Best backup in the world. Okay?” Denise waited until I nodded again before squaring her shoulders and marching out of the room. I turned to the Winchesters.

“If she gets hurt on your watch, if so much as a hair is out of place, there will be nowhere you can hide from me, and you will wish it was Lucifer hunting you down. I don’t have many friends, and I’m not about to let go of the ones I do. Understand?” My voice was perfectly even, my face blank.

The Winchesters nodded frantically. “Yep, perfectly. Going now,” Dean said quickly, running out of the room after Denise. Sam smiled weakly at me before heading to the front door, the two fans in tow. Abby and I shut and salted the door, taking up guard positions on either side.

Chuck answered questions, talked about anything and everything that came to His mind; just trying to keep everyone in the room.

Unfortunately, not everyone was satisfied. The hotel manager rose, ignoring Chuck’s attempts to stop him. I stepped forward, the angels watching with interest from the back row.

“Sir, please sit down,” I said as calmly as possible. “It’s not safe out there right now.”

He sneered at me. “I don’t have time for this nerd crap, kid. Get out of my way.”

“Sir,” I forced out, quickly losing patience. “Please, just—”

He shoved me to the side and yanked open the door, breaking the salt line. Luce and Gabe jumped up, furious. I whirled in time to see one ghost-boy materialize. He held the knife aloft and grinned. I reached out and hauled the manager back by his collar, Abby backing up to stand next to me.

The boy advanced—only to be demolished by Chuck swinging an iron stand. He slammed the door closed and turned.

“I said nobody leaves, damn it! Now somebody salt this door!” I caught Becky’s expression from the corner of my eye.

_Hey, Luce, you might get a stepmother,_ I snickered.

_Don’t give them any ideas,_ he said, horrified. I smirked, going to sit down with the others now that I knew no one was going to leave.

The rest of the room waited in tense silence until the Winchesters came back to let us out. I immediately went to Denise.

“You okay?” I asked, checking her over for any injuries.

She smiled shakily at me. “I’m fine. It was a little more intense than I was expecting, that’s all.”

“Well, we’re going to relax a little, I think. Let’s all go to Disney World!” I exclaimed.

She snorted. “Yeah, I don’t think so. What happened to school in the morning?”

My smile faded. “Well...I kind of like it here.”

“We can always come back, you know,” Abby said wryly, coming up behind us. Emergency vehicles began to pull up in front of the hotel.

“No, I know, it’s just…”I trailed off, struggling to find words.

“Wish we didn’t have those responsibilities?” Denise suggested.

I sighed heavily, leaning against the railing of the hotel porch. “Something like that, yeah. Hey.” I turned to Abby lazily. “Are you going to apply for college here? I know you talked about TrumanState…”

She tilted her head thoughtfully. “I’d need transcripts, records of education, actual memories in people, letters of recommendation—”

I snapped my fingers.

“Isn’t that an abuse of angelic power?” Denise asked dubiously.

I smirked. “Oh, please. Like Gabriel hasn’t been abusing his power for the last few millennia? It’s for a greater cause. I’m sure God will understand.”

We turned as one to look at Chuck. He caught our eyes and promptly squeaked, hiding behind Sam. My smirk widened as Abby and Denise walked over. They could easily handle God.

I made my way over to Dean and the fans that had helped us, catching the end of Dean’s statement. “...don’t even know your names.”

The shorter one started. “Oh. Well, I’m Barnes. This is Damien. What’s yours?”

That was _so_ my cue.

“Hey, Dean, the girls and I think we’re going to head back soon. Do we have your gracious permission?” Okay, so the last part was bitingly sarcastic, but I was fed up with his attitude.

“Wait, what?” Damien tilted his head, confused.

I barely held in my laughter. “Dean. You know; the hunter you guys are obsessed with?”

“But...they’re just fictional characters!” Barnes looked a little panicked.

I snorted, ignoring Dean’s exasperated attempts to shoo me away. “Dude, I’m from an alternate reality. You’re _all_ fictional characters to me. Don’t pull the existential card, okay?”

“Sorry about her,” Dean gritted out. “She’s off her meds.”

“I don’t take any.”

“You should.”

I pouted. “Meanie. So, _can_ we go? You don’t need our help to hunt, do you?”

He scowled at me, heedless of the two guys hyperventilating behind us.  “No. Get out, go back, whatever. Just leave us alone.”

“We’re coming back, you know. We just need to sort things out back home. See you in a bit!” I waved to him and ducked away from his lunge, laughing. Darting over to the girls, I flung my arms over their shoulders and grinned viciously at Chuck. Sam barely spared a glance at my antics, focused on Becky.

“Wait, what?” He looked at Chuck suspiciously before turning back to Becky.

“Didn’t you read the book?” She demanded. “There was this one scene where Bela gives the Colt to a demon named Crowley. Lilith’s right hand man. And her lover, I think.”

“Crowley,” Sam said flatly. To Chuck, “Didn’t it occur to you to tell us this before?”

While Chuck defended Himself, I motioned for the girls to lean in. “I think we’re going to head back soon. Do we want to finish school and then come back, or transfer to a high school here? Cause I’m cool with both.”

“You know, Dean has a point. If you are technically an archangel, why are you still going to school? You could just come here and do whatever you wanted,” Abby pointed out.

I frowned. “Yeah, but there’s no point in that. Besides, now I do have a plan.”

“Do we get to know what this plan is?” Denise raised her eyebrows.

“Maybe. Still, school. Allonsy!” I focused on the tugging that had gotten us into this mess in the first place, and carefully followed it back to its other end. The world jarred around us for a moment, then settled back into the high school cafeteria.

During Eighth Hour.


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, since I was late this week, you guys get an extra chapter. Thank you so much for sticking with me this far!

“Guys, you just disappeared into thin air for a whole minute!” Bill whisper-shouted, mindful of the cafeteria minders. I gaped.

“Just a minute?”

“Why, how long were you gone for?” Margaret asked, leaning forward. It figured that the fanatics would take everything in stride. We had.

Luce appeared behind me, Gabriel pulling up a chair as if to emphasize his corporealness. Margaret squeaked; Bill yelped; Elizabeth looked up from her book briefly and then ignored us.

“What,” I said slowly, glaring at Gabriel. “Do you think you are doing here?”

He smirked unrepentantly. “Sitting.”

“Hang on, is that—” Margaret began.

“Gabriel, what are you doing _here_? In this universe?” I hissed. “You can’t be here!”

“Well, obviously I can,” he said smugly.

My glare intensified. “You _shouldn’t be here!_ Go back!”

His grin turned predatory. “But it’s so much fun here! And there’s no Winchesters. I think I’ll stick around for a while.”

“Great. How did you manage to get two archangels tagging along with you?” Denise asked me.

I looked at her incredulously. “Why do you expect me to know? And it’s just Gabriel. We all know how Luce got here.”

“Well, yeah, but—” Abby started.

“Wait, there’s someone else? Here? I’m confused,” Bill stated. I sighed and pushed my Grace at all three of them. Luce smirked at them.

“Rhiannon!” Elizabeth glared exasperatedly at me.

“Why does everyone automatically assume it’s my fault?” I complained.

“Because it usually is,” Denise told me dryly.

I pouted. Everyone laughed at me.

“What is everyone laughing at?” Rachel stood behind Gabe, clearly not recognizing him.

“Me,” I said glumly.

“Oh, okay then. Why?” She raised an eyebrow.

I pushed Grace at her. This was getting kind of irritating. Maybe I should let everyone see him, like a mass email.

She stared, and blinked. Then—

“Rhiannon!”

Everyone broke down in hysterics again, Gabe falling out of his chair. Even Luce was chuckling lowly behind me.

“Which of you invited the sugar-high pedophile?” Schroll peered down at Gabe, who still gasped for breath.

“No one, technically. He followed me home,” I offered sheepishly. I glanced over at the monitors’ table. Griner and Roegner still sat there, chatting. Roegner looked up at us briefly—and looked horrorstruck at the group’s new members.

I grinned evilly and sent a thread of Grace at Schroll and Griner.

Luce stuck his tongue out at Schroll. She raised an eyebrow at him.

“You should probably get that looked at,” she told him. Glancing once more at Gabe— _still_ on the floor—she headed back to the table, shaking her head.

Roegner headdesked.

Luce was stunned. “Your friends are strange,” he said eventually.

“Dude, Schroll is _not_ my friend. She hates me. Or she ‘doesn’t hate me, exactly, because that would require thinking about me, and I’m not worth the effort.’” I rolled my eyes.

Luce frowned. “Why?”

I shrugged. “We just clash. Too similar, I guess.”

His frown intensified. “Why wouldn’t you get along, then? If you are so similar.”

“Because they’re both stubborn,” Denise chipped in. “Kind of how you and Michael are both so pig-headed that neither of you will give way to the other.”

“Does that make Schroll Michael’s vessel?” I wondered absently.

We all contemplated that possibility for a moment.

“We’re doomed,” Rachel said cheerfully, dropping her bag on the table and stealing Gabe’s seat. He sulked.

“Will you get off of the floor?” I glared at him. I was doing a lot of that.

“But it’s so comfortable down here. And the view isn’t bad, either,” he leered.

I stared at him incredulously. Luce scowled and stepped on his stomach.

“ _Ow_ , Luci!” Gabe yelped.

“Stop it, you two,” I scolded. “I was rather hoping to teach high school, not first grade,” I told Denise despondently. She patted me on the shoulder.

“Look at it this way. They were kindergarteners before. It only took them a few days to mature a grade. At this rate, you’ll only have to put up with this for another few weeks,” she consoled me. I shook my head.

“You forget, they progressed to middle school and then regressed. It’s going to be a little under a year. I don’t think this is going to end well.” I shoved my way out of the doors, not bothering to check if the angels were following me. They could find their own way home; I doubted they wanted to ride the bus.

Abby shrugged. “Ply them with music and candy—”

“I heard candy.” Gabe appeared right in front us, Luce flickering in just a second later.

“Not for you, you prat. Piss off; I’m going to miss the bus.” I tried shoving past him.

“You can fly, and you want to take the _bus_?” And yeah, so he had a point there.

“I’ll see you tomorrow, Rhiannon,” Denise laughed.

“Yeah, leave me with the crazies, why don’t you,” I sulked. I held it for a few seconds before flying home. What? I should be allowed to enjoy the perks.

“Gabriel, you _cannot_ follow me home! Not only will my parents _not be pleased_ , but I have better things to do than entertaining you!” I shouted exasperatedly.

Something flashed over his face, too quickly for me to define it, before his trademark smirk took its place. He snapped his fingers and disappeared. I blinked and turned to look at Luce. Who was frowning heavily at me.

“Oh, don’t _you_ start,” I snarled, storming up the stairs. I was determined to ignore the archangels for the rest of the day, at least.

* * *

 

Denise swung her bag onto the table and thumped into the seat next to me. I raised my eyebrows. She dropped her head on her arms.

“You feeling okay?” I asked mildly.

She mumbled something into her arms.

“What?”

She raised her head a millimeter. “Parents. School. Pressure.”

I tilted my head. “You need a break?”

Denise groaned. “Yes please. Hey,” she frowned and raised her head a little more. “Where are your angels?”

I scowled. “They’re not my angels. And sulking, I think.”

“What did you do?”

I huffed. “Why do you automatically assume it’s my fault? I just said they shouldn’t follow me around all the time because I have other priorities!”

“ _Rhiannon!_ ”

“ _What_?”

Denise shook her head incredulously and didn’t respond. I rolled my eyes.

“So, my family and I are going to Tennessee this weekend, and could leave tomorrow if we wanted to tour VanderbiltUniversity,” I changed the subject. They were archangels; they could find their way back. Eventually. Maybe.

“Can I come?” Denise asked hopefully.

“You want me to kidnap you to Nashville for the weekend?” I snorted. “Yeah, that’ll go over well with your parents.”

“I’m going to look at a college in the interest of furthering my education. They can’t really find fault with that.” Denise nodded decisively. I shook my head fondly.

“We’ll have to get planned absence forms and make sure that it’s okay with Schweikhard. And your parents. And mine,” I finished sheepishly.

“Okay. Guidance office?” Denise gathered her things and stood.

I pulled out my phone. “Yeah, and I’m going to call my parents and convince them that this is an excellent idea.”

As expected, my parents agreed, if exasperatedly. We collected our teachers’ signatures throughout the day, as requested. Denise seemed to be doing okay, though I was getting more and more distracted. Luce had hardly left me since Tuesday—and had it really only been two days?—and I was a little worried about setting Gabe loose on the world.

Denise offered no help at all.

“Just apologize, Rhiannon,” she scolded. “Really, how hard can it be?”

“Why do I need to apologize to them?” I asked, throwing up my hands and sitting on the couch. “Seriously, Gabriel has better things to do than hang around me, and Luce probably has archangel-y stuff to do.”

“ _You’re_ an archangel,” she pointed out.

“No, Luce is the archangel. I’m his vessel. There’s a difference,” I countered.

Denise rolled her eyes. “Whatever helps you sleep at night. What time are we leaving?”

“Before six? Not that it’ll be a problem for us, seeing as we’re so used to getting up at the crack of dawn,” I said dryly. “The spare bedroom’s still made up, by the way.”

“I thought you were going to take it apart?” Denise was laughing at me.

“Yeah, well, I say a lot of things I don’t mean.” And I really hoped the angels were eavesdropping for once, because that was as much of an explanation as they were getting.

“Why are you going to Tennessee in the first place?” Luce asked from his perch on the couch arm. I startled and glared.

“My sister’s soccer tournament; we’re just using it as an excuse to get away from Denise’s parents. Where’s Gabriel?” I asked, wary.

Luce shrugged. “Visiting Denise’s family, I think.”

My mood darkened abruptly. “Gabriel, if you don’t get your molting, bedraggled arse back here in the next twelve seconds, I’m going to confiscate all your candy.”

“You wouldn’t _dare_ ,” came the furious response.

“Try me,” I snarled right back. Neither of us broke gazes until Denise spoke up.

“Gabe, what exactly were you doing to my family?”

“Nothing…physically. Just gave them a friendly little warning, that’s all.”

He smiled innocently. My eyes narrowed. Denise and Luce exchanged long-suffering looks.

“What is this?” Luce frowned, as if only just now noticing that the couch was nearly buried in pillows and blankets. I shrugged.

“Denise and I made a nest.”

Gabe vanished. Again. Luce frowned. Again. I threw my hands into the air.

“I give up!”

“You are completely clueless, you know that?” Denise mumbled from her hands.

“Oh, shove off. I’m going to go pack.”


	7. Chapter 7

Thankfully, the angels had decided to fly to Tennessee, so the car wasn’t cramped beyond reason. Or suddenly expanded via Trickster powers.

Denise and I weren’t terribly impressed with Vanderbilt, as we hadn’t really ever seriously considered it. Luce had shown up halfway through dinner, though Gabe remained missing. I really hoped he wasn’t pranking some unsuspecting person.

_“You should apologize to him,” Luce reprimanded. “Or at least explain to him what your intentions are.”_

_“_ Intentions _?” I sputtered. “What’s that supposed to mean?”_

_“You are sending him mixed signals,” he told me slowly. As if I was supposed to know._

_“Mixed signals for what?” I rubbed my temples. “I haven’t done anything!”_

_He sighed, as if this was a great burden. “You told him he wasn’t important to you, that you had other priorities. You then built a nest with your friend—”_

_“Denise and I were watching television! In comfort! It’s a human thing—well, more of a girl thing, but that’s not the point. How is that mixed signals?” I folded my arms._

_“Nesting is very important in angel courtship—”he tried._

_“Dude, Denise is like my sister! That would be like you and…and Castiel!”_

_The grimace that crossed Luce’s face got the point across. “Nevertheless, you should be telling him this, not me.”_

_“Buddy, I would love to, but he’s not actually answering my calls, and until he starts acting like the eons-old being he is, I’m going to let him work off his sulk.”_

_“Very mature.”_

_“Hey,” I snarled, whirling around and stabbing my finger into Luce’s face. “I am not the one who ran off with no explanation, without waiting, and is giving the other the cold shoulder. I know he’s your brother, but he’s being an idiot right now. And I’m getting really tired of you defending him. Why can’t you both just_ leave me alone?”

Denise sat up in the pull out bed next to the window of the hotel room. “Rhiannon, did you just do something stupid?”

I winced, shaking my head. “No, we’re just trying to work something out. Get some more sleep.” I waited until her breath evened out before rolling onto my back and heaving a sigh.

I was so screwed.

* * *

 

Neither of them showed up the entire Saturday. Denise kept shooting me suspicious looks, but didn’t comment. At least not out loud. Mostly because Crowley and Meg showed up. That was a complication we really didn’t need right now.

They’d arrived within seconds of each other, just after my sister and parents had left for her soccer game. Typically, they started sniping at each other, ignoring our bewildered stares.

“OI!” I eventually shouted, immediately getting their attention. “Mind telling me exactly what you are doing here?”

Both demons fell to the floor, bowing. Denise fell to the floor, laughing. I was distinctly unimpressed, and frowned at the lot of them.

“We came to find you, My Lord—” Crowley began, breaking off at my horrified flailing.

“ _I am not your Lord_!”

Meg snickered. “The Winchesters told us where you were, Luciannon.”

The look on my face sent Denise into renewed spasms.

“I am going to kill them,” I snarled, half-standing.

“We came to discuss the state of Hell,” Crowley interjected quickly. I paused, staring at him.

“Why? I thought you were doing just fine.” I tilted my head.

“He’s the self-proclaimed regent, but he’s thrown out the rulebook,” Meg objected heatedly. “There are procedures, traditions—”

“Hell needs to improve, times are changing!” Crowley snapped.

“Improve how?” I asked. He turned to me.

“Torture is all well and good, but true hell requires a little more creativity than just pain can give us. Queuing and cubicles are the bane of everyone’s existence. And paperwork.”

“He’s gotten rid of the torture completely! You can’t give equal treatment in Hell!” Meg looked at me hopefully.

I raised my eyebrows at Denise. She tilted her head and frowned thoughtfully. I shook my head. She shrugged. We turned back to the demons.

“Okay, ground rules,” I began. “Any children in hell twelve in under need to be sent to Heaven. Talk to Castiel, work out an arrangement. You will both be co-regents in my stead, since I don’t fancy the day-to-day running of Hell. For serious offenders—serial killers, pedophiles, rapists, child and wife abusers, that sort of thing—bring back the torture. Physical or psychological, it’s up to you two. For mild offenders and those who sold their souls, stick with Crowley’s invention. Criteria and other punishment I’ll leave for you to decide. Don’t kill each other, and consult me on any major changes or problems.”

They nodded and stood, glaring distastefully at each other before disappearing. I sighed and fell back on the bed. “I hate my job.”

Denise patted my arm consolingly. “At least you get to delegate. Perks of being the boss.”

* * *

 

Sunday, she finally mentioned the elephant in the room.

“So, where are your angels?” she asked casually.

I gritted my teeth. “They are all-powerful beings from the beginning of Time, they don’t need a babysitter. And they certainly have other duties than hanging around us 24/7.”

She frowned at me. “You upset them again, didn’t you?”

I face planted into the blankets. “I don’t understand angels. They don’t make any sense.”

“They could say the same about you,” Denise pointed out logically.

“No, they couldn’t. Gabriel’s been playing Trickster for millennia, and Lucifer practically made studying humans the work of his existence. Humans have zero true lore on angels, much less whatever culture or traditions they have. Though clearly none of them are capable of making sensible conversation.” I closed the novel I had been writing while the angels were gone, and shut the laptop.

“You could always pray to them,” she suggested.

“What do you think I’ve been doing?” I sighed. “They refuse to answer me; I’m pretty sure they’re ignoring me. I’ll just give them some time to cool off. And don’t intervene, okay?” I pleaded.

“But—”

“Look, I know you want to help, but this is between the three of us,” I said heavily. “We all misunderstood each other, and I made some mistakes. I’ll fix it, promise.” I smiled reassuringly.

Denise eyed me doubtfully, but nodded. “If you haven’t made up by the end of the week, I’m calling the cavalry,” she added.

“Thanks, Denise,” I whispered, looking down at my ‘Luci Boots.’ Black leather cowboy boots with red detailing angel wings and a cross, they were my last attempt at an olive branch. It seemed, however, that Luce had taken my last words to heart; he had even cut me off from his Grace as much as he could. It hurt, admittedly, and I didn’t know what else to do.

I just hoped that the damage wasn’t permanent, and the angels came back soon.

* * *

 

Monday rolled around, and there was still no sign of the angels. Denise seemed exhausted, as if she had stayed up all night running. She also seemed to have dropped the subject, which should have made me suspicious instead of relieved.

When Denise was worried, she never totally dropped the subject.

Still, I was distracted and nervous all day...which was probably Gabe’s point, the bastard. Not only was I preoccupied with the archangels, but I had a math quiz to make up and an Apotheosis meeting after school, which Denise wouldn’t be able to make. Life as Lucifer’s vessel should not be this complicated. Right?

I rubbed my temples as the final bell rang, my headache growing. I would need to go all the way to the math building, clear across campus. Awesome.

I squinted down the hallway. “Denise? I thought you weren’t going to be here today.”

“I wasn’t,” she sneered. “But there’s been a change in schedule.”

Her eyes flashed black. Demon-black.

_Crap._

I had no Grace, no angels hanging around, no demon-killing knife or the Colt; I didn’t even have a regular weapon, much good it would have done me. And I sure as hell wasn’t going to pray and hope someone would answer. The last thing I needed was divine wrath raining down on Denise and whoever was riding her. I wanted my friend to come out of this intact, thanks.

_I’m so screwed_ , I thought, staring at the vicious grin distorting her kind face.


	8. Chapter 8

“So, who exactly is riding my best friend?” I asked casually.

It was countless minutes, likely hours, after school ended. The demon and her lackeys—of _course_ she had lackeys—had moved me somewhere heavily warded. Every square inch of the room, and I assumed the building, was covered in Enochian sigils. My hands were chained behind my back and attached to my ankles where I knelt on the floor. Complex circles, pentagrams, and symbols spiraled out from the center of the room, weaving the foundation for a spell that was probably a bit not good. The demon lackeys stood at intervals around the edges of the room, the leader in front of me.

“Call me Ruby,” she smirked, drawing a wickedly jagged knife, also engraved with sigils.

I rolled my eyes. “Of course,” I muttered. “It figures that I would get captured by the crazy bitch that let Luce out in the first place.”

She lunged forward and struck me across the face. “You dare disrespect him!”

I barked out a harsh laugh. “Honey, a nickname is far from the worst thing I’ve said about or to that angel. Now, how about you let me and my friend go and no one gets hurt?”

Ruby laughed, the harsh sound grating in Denise’s voice. “Who are you trying to kid? You don’t have Grace, you can’t hurt us, and the angels can’t find you. Assuming they even notice or care that you are gone in the first place.”

I flinched, because yeah, that was a thought that had been plaguing me since Luce and Gabe disappeared for the second time. Ruby’s smirk grew wider.

“You do realize that the only reason Lucifer is still around is because _you_ tied yourself to him? That he only turned to you in the first place because he was desperate? If Sam said yes, you would still be the pathetic, worthless human when he found you.” I turned my face away, trying to focus on the bond, trying to pray to my angels. “And Gabriel? He’s here for the only brother that understands why he left Heaven. He doesn’t want to stick around after he was outed in his own universe, and he has far more opportunities to cause mayhem here. You didn’t think he came here for _you_ , did you?”

I shut my eyes tightly. “Oh, you did, didn’t you? How disgustingly naïve. As if one angel would be interested in you, much less two archangels. Not that it’ll be a problem for much longer.”

I really couldn’t be bothered to ask her what she was blathering on about, as I was too busy trying not to hyperventilate and lose myself in the chaos of my thoughts.

“We’re going to make sure our Lord has his perfect vessel, the way he should have had from the beginning. We can’t kill you, not without killing him, but we can still bury you.”

That was important, I knew that, but I was having some trouble focusing. Dimly, I registered chanting and cold steel biting into my skin, and shadows rushing in from...everywhere. Brilliant light followed it, and the ground started shaking. Though that last part might just have been me.

I fell.

* * *

 

_“I can hold her here, but she’s fighting me. She needs motivation.”_

_“How was she even captured in the first place?”_

_“Rhiannon, can you hear me? You need to come back to us now, okay?”_

* * *

 

_“You did WHAT?”_

_“You were both being stubborn! She shoved me away!”_

_“HEY! Blame each other later, she’s fading.”_

* * *

 

_“It’s her choice, Lucifer. I won’t do that to her.”_

_“You think she hasn’t thought about it? Your feelings aren’t that different from hers.”_

_“It’s fantastic that you’re working through your issues, but could you please save her?”_

* * *

 

_“I’m inside her head; I know what I’m talking about, Gabriel.”_

_“It doesn’t matter, I need her consent.”_

_“You’re like a teenage boy trying to ask his ten-year crush to prom. Hurry up, will you?”_

* * *

 

_“Rhiannon? You have to come back; your angels need you.”_

_“Come on, Rhiannon, where’s that stubbornness? At least give Gabriel a chance.”_

_“Rhiannon, I can fix this, but I need your help. I need you to consent.”_

As if I could ever truly deny any of them. _Of course._

* * *

 

I blinked awake to the red gloom of Bobby’s panic room. Luce’s face entered my field of vision seconds later, glowering fiercely.

“What,” he said calmly, dangerously, “were you thinking?”

I sat up, wincing a little and hacking when I tried to speak. Luce’s expression didn’t change, but he did support me and conjure water. I didn’t quite meet his eyes.

“I wasn’t?” I hedged.

“That much was clear.” Still that too-fucking-calm voice.

I gritted my teeth, refusing to get angry at Luce for something that was my fault. “Look, it was a win-win situation—”

“HOW IS THAT A WIN-WIN?” Luce’s True Voice shook the state of South Dakota, though nothing was broken. Probably.

I shrugged, still not meeting his gaze. “You’d get an actual vessel that functions the way it’s supposed to, and I wouldn’t hurt somebody I care about for once. Win-win.” It really was that simple, despite what Luce’s expression otherwise suggested.

“Is the idjit up? I’ve got a teenage girl and a Trickster archangel competing to see who can pace through my floor fastest. They can come down now, right?” Bobby slid open the panel in the iron door. “My money’s on the girl, by the way.”

“That’s fine, sir,” I said quickly, before Luce could open his mouth. He shot a glare at me as Bobby gaped.

“It’s Bobby, ya idjit. I think we’ve already had this conversation.”

“No, you said I couldn’t call you Mr. Singer. You said nothing about sir.” I peered around him as Denise thundered down the stairs, Gabe simply snapping himself into the room with us. He met my eyes briefly before flinching slightly and looking away.

I frowned. That was not a good sign.

Denise tackled me, yelling into my ear too fast for me to understand. I awkwardly patted her on the back, sneaking glances at my angels and the hunters—the Winchesters had apparently arrived while I was...out of it.

Something important had happened, something that they all knew about and weren’t telling me.

“Denise,” I murmured. “I need to breathe, love.” I slowly untangled myself from her, though not completely. We both needed the reassurance right now.

“So,” I began carefully. “Anybody want to discuss the elephant in the room?”

Dead silence. The males exchanged wary looks while Denise’s expression blanked.

“To be fair,” Dean said abruptly. “You did consent, and as I understand it, the bond only works if both parties are willing and able. So you can’t really complain.”

I tilted my head very slowly. “Excuse me?”

Dean waved a hand blithely, ignoring the terrified angels and his desperate brother trying to shut him up. “Well, whatever you have with Luci wasn’t strong enough to tie you here, so we figured a second bond would help boost the signal, so to speak. It’s not exactly the same, of course—”

No, I could feel that much. My newfound bond with Gabriel was hardly the same as the vessel bond Luce and I shared. I tuned Rifle One out as I followed the tether to its other end—only to bounce off of a burning wall.

I jerked back, clenching my jaw and fists. Before anyone could react, I shoved my own wall up, blocking both archangels—and was the bond with Luce weaker, or was my perception just skewed?—latching onto the link back to our home universe and taking Denise back home. I stumbled, dizzy, before she supported me.

“We should go to your house; I can wait for a ride. You need rest.” She looked sympathetic and...pitying? Awesome. Still, she had a point.

Oh, look, my living room has a couch. There was no way in hell I was going to school tomorrow. I should probably tell my parents as well, though it sounded as if Denise was taking care of that for me. I should get my best friend something nice for her birthday…


	9. Chapter 9

I slept for three days.

When I woke up, around ten in the morning, Death was sitting at the other end of the couch. With everything that had happened, I was perfectly entitled to a shriek. Denise careened around the corner and skidded to a stop once she spotted the First Horseman.

“What are you doing in my house?” I yelped.

“I’m here because you’ve been almost comatose for most of the week. You have homework, by the way,” Denise said, going back into the kitchen. I propped myself up on the pillows and stared at Death. Death stared back.

“So, Derek,” I began.

“Derek?” he asked, amused.

I shrugged. “Terry Pratchett is awesome. I just feel uncomfortable calling you Death. So, Derek, why are you here?”

Death ate one of his fried pickle chips. “You know, it’s a very interesting relationship you have with the two...what did you call them? The rebel archangels.”

My eyes narrowed. “Yeah, I bet. That doesn’t answer my question.”

“Rhiannon, don’t provoke Death; it’s not healthy,” Denise called. I pouted.

“But it’s so much fun!”

Death raised an eyebrow. “You have a unique outlook on life, girl.”

“I have a name; you could use it.” I leant back and closed my eyes.

Death laughed. “True. Though I am interested to know why you are being so spectacularly stupid lately.”

“Thank you,” Denise said, sticking her head around the corner. “She’s not listening to any of us. Maybe you can knock some sense into her.”

“You trade in death, not life. What, exactly, am I being so stupid about that you can recognize it?” I crossed my arms and scowled unrepentantly.

“Do you think bonds like you have happen every day? Hardly,” he continued, raising a finger to forestall my protests. “There have only been six others in my entire existence, and most of those between the same level of angel, let alone between an archangel and a human.”

I sat forward, glaring fiercely at the Horseman. “I don’t care about anyone else. What I care about is what happens next? Do things go on as normal? Do we get rid of it?”

“Why, in Creation’s name, would you want to get rid of it?” Death asked furiously, matching my glare. “Why wouldn’t you want such a gift?”

“Because _he_ doesn’t want it! Neither of them do!” I was on my feet now, shouting. “They are bonds born of necessity, and convenience, and desperation! Nothing more. I won’t be responsible for trapping them, for hurting them.” I sucked in breath, trying to keep my tears away. “You are the embodiment of Death, of Destruction. Can you undo this?”

Death unfolded himself, rising to his admittedly impressive height. I ignored Denise, holding the Horseman’s gaze. His lips thinned.

“Even if I could, why should I? This is _entertaining_ , and there’s been a shortage of fun since the creation of the platypus.” He crumpled up his chip bag and atomized it. “I think you could benefit from this. Please try not to screw it up.” He vanished.

I turned to face Denise’s glare. “What?”

She huffed and went back into the kitchen. I followed and leaned against the doorway. “Look, Denise—”

She slammed the butter knife onto the counter. “No, _you_ look, Rhiannon!” She squared off against me, her fists tight against her thighs. “What happened with the demons, what they told you; whatever’s going on in that thick skull of yours: it’s not true. Your angels care about you, and they don’t regret anything that’s happened—except maybe the demons abducting you. You didn’t see the aftermath. Luci never left you; I think he fought for you harder than he did for the Apocalypse. Gabriel almost went insane waiting for you to wake up—I think even _Dean_ pitied him. You shouldn’t push them away, not after all they’ve done for you.”

“I didn’t _ask_ them to!” I snarled. “Whatever Gabriel did, he should’ve just left well enough alone. He obviously didn’t want this, and I refuse to be responsible for hurting him.”

Denise tossed up her hands. “You two are exactly alike, I swear. He’s worried that you would be upset he forced you into this, and you think he formed a bond with you purely out of desperation.”

“Oh, come on, you heard Dean—”

“Because he’s so well-known for his tact.”

“I was dying; they didn’t have any other options. I’m fine now; they don’t need to be tethered to me. I’m sure God can make Luce a body—”

“Are you even _listening_ to yourself?” Denise stepped forward angrily. “You want to get rid of one of the best things in your life, without even thinking about it? Why don’t you talk to your angels, ask them what _they_ want?”

“If they want this so badly, why do they keep pushing me away? Gabriel didn’t even give me a chance,” I said, suddenly exhausted.

“Talk to them,” Denise repeated. “You’ve all been dancing around each other for so long; I don’t think you even remember how easy it was at first. You were like a family.”

I let out a shaky breath. “We aren’t controlling the plot here. This isn’t one of our fanfictions. Everything isn’t going to tie up neatly and everyone won’t be happy. After all of this, I don’t know if I can handle them leaving again.”

“So you’ll leave first?” Denise offered, softening. “Rhiannon, I would never encourage you to do something that could hurt you. You know that, right?”

“Of course I do! I’m just…”

“Scared?”

I sighed. “I’ve gotten so used to them. What do I do if I was right?”

Denise pulled me into a hug. “Not that they’ll leave, but you’ll always have us, Rhiannon. When you’re ready, just say the word and I’ll give you some space.”

I nodded, rubbing my cheek with the heel of my hand. “Thanks, Denise.”

“Anytime, friend. And if they do hurt you,” she added pleasantly, “we will all deal with them, okay?”

I laughed wetly. “Yeah, okay. I should probably do this before I lose my courage.”

She squeezed me slightly before letting go and grabbing her wallet. “I’m going to walk to the Bread Co. I’ll call you when I’m heading back.” I returned her grin weakly and slowly sat back down on the couch. Now I actually had to go through with it. I closed my eyes and began to pray.

* * *

 

Half an hour later, I opened my eyes and slumped back into the cushions. They weren’t answering, and I could barely feel them through the little bit of the bond I dared use. I was about ready to throw in the towel. Although, maybe I should just pause for a bit—

My stomach was yanked up into my throat as I flew unceremoniously through the multiverse. I landed on my face in a parking lot, hard. I climbed to my feet, groaning. Looking up at the building in front of me, I froze. And then facepalmed.

Of course. I changed my mind. My angels were so dead.

Pushing open the doors, I stared at the empty lobby before heading to the ballroom. Clearly Mercury hadn’t expected me to get here this soon. Not that I cared. They were all going to die if they dared try and hurt my boys.

The doors were closed; obviously there was an important meeting taking place. Straining my ears, I could make out Kali’s monologue.

“...arrogance. You think you're the only ones on earth? You pillage and you butcher in your God's name. But you're not the only religion, and he's not the only God. And now you think you can just rip the planet apart? You're wrong. There are billions of us. And we were here first. If anyone gets to end this world, it's me. I'm sorry.”

“I’d say me too,” I cut in conversationally, blasting the doors open and tossing the gods into the walls. “But I’m doing so well in rehab. ‘I must not tell lies,’ etcetera, etcetera. You guys okay?” I turned to the Winchesters, catching their nods before checking Gabriel over. I mentally searched for their blood and promptly destroyed the spell. That done, I surveyed the pagans.

“Who are you?” Kali snarled.

I laughed. “And here I thought you lot did your homework. I’ll give you...a D for effort, I think.”

“Lucifer,” Mercury whispered from his corner on the ceiling. I looked up at him.

“No. Seriously, how did you guys not know?” I unbound the ropes on the hunters. “Get the people out, will you?”

“Yeah, sure thing. Luciannon,” Dean smirked.

“Screw you, Winchester,” I retorted mildly. “I’ve had a really bad week; do not get on my shit list. Now,” I cocked my head. “Where were we?”

“Archangels can be killed,” Kali snapped.

“True. Usually takes someone of equal or greater power though. Or a Winchester,” I added thoughtfully. She sneered.

“You think yourselves so powerful, but who gave you the right to this planet?”

“Uh, one? Chuck. Two? We are powerful, sweetheart. I’m not even breaking a sweat with this stunt.” I gestured to the room in general.

“You’re bluffing,” Baldur said shakily.

I contemplated the two leaders. “It’s been a long time since someone’s said no to either of you, hasn’t it? I love to break it to you; I’m not a big fan of following the rules.”

“It’s true. She’s the one vessel I’ve met who said the big Yes and immediately decided to stay in control instead, and screw the consequences,” Gabriel piped up. “Everything I told you about Lucifer? She’s a thousand times worse.”

“Flattery will get you nowhere, Gabe,” I chided. “We need to talk later anyway. As for the rest of you, everyone but the two idiots in front of me can go. Try and kill me or my friends, I’ll kill you. Keep killing humans, I’ll hunt you down and kill you. If we cross at odds again, I’ll kill you. Capiche?” I waited until the room cleared before examining the two pagans in front of me. “Now, to deal with you two.” I ambled closer, frowning up at Baldur.

“You’re Norse, right?” I distantly registered the Winchesters returning, but stayed focused on my prey. “I’ve read the lore, but I’m thinking something was left out, seeing as you’re alive and kicking.” I cocked my head and stared at him, unblinking.

“It is the world after the first Ragnarok. Many were reborn.” He glared hatefully at Gabriel. “Loki deserved his punishment and more.”

My eyes flashed. “Yeah? Well, humans tend to idealize you. They call you the god of light, and innocence, and purity and goodness. Yet all I see is a spiteful child that can’t stand the fact that he’s not the center of the universe anymore. I’m not really keen on letting you live.”

“You can’t!” Baldur cried. I smiled darkly.

“Watch me.” I plunged my hand into his chest, grabbing his heart and twisting slowly. I pushed Grace through every fiber of his being, disintegrating his flesh before scattering his spirit. I wiped my hand on the tablecloth gingerly. I had no idea where the god had been.

“And now for you. You were going to kill Gabriel and hand the Winchesters over to Lucifer,” I stated, turning on Kali. “Congratulations, you’ve made the Top Ten of my Most Hated List. Most people don’t stay there for very long.”

“Killing me won’t help anything. It’ll only prove exactly how alike you and Lucifer are.”

“I know our similarities, and I know our differences. And killing you will certainly help stop you from hurting me and mine in the future. So...” I trailed off, reaching for her chest.

“Wait!” Gabriel burst out.

I spun incredulously towards him. “Seriously?”

“She made a mistake, that’s all. She’s just trying to do what’s best for her people,” Gabe pleaded.

“She was going to _kill you_ ,” I said slowly, in case Gabriel had forgotten that part.

“Yeah, I know, I was there. But she’s not so different from our family. She only wants to protect her family and her home.” Gabe gazed earnestly at me, even trying the puppy eyes.

Of course. He and Kali had been a thing, once upon a time, and obviously Gabriel still had feelings for her, if unrequited ones. Though this was pretty big for _sentiment_.

“Fine,” I said curtly. I turned back to the goddess. “Next time we meet, I’ll kill you. And every single day until then, you had better pray to the Archangel Gabriel, seeing as he’s the only reason you’re still alive. Now,” I added, stepping back. “If you’ll all excuse me, I’ve another wayward archangel to find. Do try not to find anymore trouble?”

I grasped the link between Luce and me and pulled. Instead of bringing him to me, I appeared in Chuck’s living room, staring at the man Himself, Death, and my first angel—all looking back with varying degrees of sheepishness. And Luce had a flesh and blood body now, apparently.

“Very well, then. I believe that’s my cue,” Death said in his smug voice, disappearing.

“Right, yeah, I’m just gonna...I have...things. To write. Bye,” Chuck said quickly, retreating to the relative safety of the kitchen and shutting the doors. Luce and I stared at each other.

“So, you have a body. Congratulations,” I broke the silence awkwardly, wincing.

“Rhiannon,” he started, pained.

“Hey, no, really,” I insisted. “You deserve it, after everything you’ve gone through. Just...a little warning would have been appreciated, you know?”

“I’m sorry,” he said quietly. I smiled at him, strained.

“Why did you cut me out?” I asked, my smile fading. “I was trying to reach out, I was praying—” Luce grabbed my shoulders.

“I had my Father dampen the bond, just for a little while. The process is...extremely painful. I didn’t want you to go through that, not if you didn’t have to. You didn’t deserve that.” He lifted my chin with one long forefinger. “I would never cut you off completely, not after my last mistake. I won’t lose one of the most important people in my existence.”

“Most important, huh?” I teased. He snorted and drew me into a hug.

“When I first met you, in your dream, you reminded me of Gabriel so much. The other archangels and I have our differences, and I wasn’t all that close to my younger siblings. But...from what I’ve observed about the Winchesters, you are, in essence, the little sister everyone wants. And you’re mine. Unconditional love is rare, even among angels. Perhaps it is because of your stubbornness.”

“So, a human thing then?” I grinned up at him.

He huffed out a laugh. “If you like, yes.”

“Cool. Think we should tell your Father it’s safe to come out now?”

“Have you spoken to Gabriel?”

I winced. “Not...exactly. He was kind of at a pagan convention that was trying to decide how to kill you, and I crashed the party. We will talk though, don’t worry,” I added at Luce’s frown.

“Good. You both deserve happiness. I give you my blessing,” he said formally.

I stared at him for a moment, and then broke down into hysterics.

“Luce, if you are going to imitate and follow human customs and culture, we really need to work on your delivery,” I hiccupped, still laughing.

He pouted at me. “What’s wrong with it?”

“We just need to get you more comfortable with it, that’s all. Right now, you kinda sound like a stuffy museum curator from the 50s.” Okay, so maybe I was exaggerating a bit, but it was partially true.

Luce rolled his eyes. “Fine. Shall we go find Gabriel now?”

“Yeah, sure.” I stepped back out of Luce’s grip before smiling impishly. “Race you!”

My brother’s laughter followed me into the air.


	10. Chapter 10

We found Gabriel holed up with the hunters and Cas in a motel the next town over from the Elysian Fields Hotel. The humans, predictably, pulled guns on us as soon as we appeared.

“Do you mind?” I asked, amusedly.

“Not really,” Dean retorted. “What are you doing here?”

“Hey, I said I’d come back, didn’t I? Besides, I needed to talk to him.” I gestured in Gabriel’s general direction, not quite meeting his eyes. I had resolved to talk to him, but I wasn’t going to make it easy. Especially after the Kali debacle.

“Okay,” Gabe said simply. I ignored the hunters’ sputtering and demanding answers, taking off with Gabriel close behind. I steered towards Stonehenge, a place that felt natural to me. I landed softly, thankful that the tourism was closed and no one was around.

Opening my mouth, I found myself at a loss as to what happened now. We needed to clear the air, but I had no idea where to start.

“Why did you stop me from killing her?” Apparently my mind didn’t get a say.

Gabriel shifted uncomfortably. “You were going to kill her because she was trying to survive. I’ve done a lot worse for less reason. If you can forgive me―”

“She was going to stab you through the heart!”

“You think I’d just hand over my real blade? That thing can kill me!” He ran a frustrated hand through his hair. “That’s not the point―”

“Of course that’s the point!” I shouted, whirling away. “You could have _died_ tonight, Gabriel, I couldn’t let that happen again!”

“What do you mean, again? I’m an expert in faking my death,” he told me exasperatedly.

“No!” I spun back, furious. “I’ve seen you die, Gabriel, _true_ death. No tricks, no resurrection, just you, on the floor, _gone_. I can’t―” I cut myself off, choking on tears.

He strode over, wrapping around me tightly. “Hey, I’m right here, okay? I’m fine, I’m not going anywhere. I got you.” He whispered reassurances as I broke down, for the first time since this all started. We stood there for a few minutes, until my eyes ran dry.

“What did you mean, you saw me die?” Gabe asked softly. I inhaled shakily.

“Where I’m from...certain kinds of knowledge are available to the public. It’s…” I sighed, frustrated. “No, screw it. I’m tired of dancing around this. This universe, the people, the events: in my world, it’s a television show. _Supernatural_ , focused on the Winchesters, goes through a ton of shit and nearly ends the world more than a few times.” I spoke into Gabriel’s chest, not wanting to see his expression. “In season five, the one we’re in now, Lucifer never meets me―obviously―and a lot of good people die.”

“Wait, does―” Gabriel asked, pulling back slightly in shock.

“Lucifer kills you,” I said bluntly. “You helped the Winchesters and Kali get away, and paid the price for going against your brother. Gabe.” I stepped back out of his arms, immediately feeling cold. “God hadn’t been found, the Apocalypse was still on, and everyone was miserable. Things are happening differently this time round, but I’m not sure what will and won’t change.”

“Does Lucifer know?” Gabe asked, neutral.

I shrugged. “Maybe. I never told him, but that doesn’t mean he didn’t find out on his own.”

He inhaled deeply. “Right. Okay then.” His eyes narrowed as he smirked. “Can I watch it?”

I stared at him, horrified. “It’s starting its ninth season soon, you don’t know what could happen! The most you could watch is―” I broke off, tilting my head and examining him shrewdly. “Huh. That might work. We could invite Luce as well, make a marathon out of it.” I nodded slowly. “Yeah. I like this plan. And there’s plenty more to watch afterwards.”

“Fine, fine, if we must.” Gabriel sighed dramatically. “Speaking of Luce, he sort of explained the whole cultural misunderstanding thing. I shouldn’t have jumped to the wrong conclusions.”

I smiled sheepishly at him. “I should have explained things to you. Or just thought before I spoke. Still, now we know what to look out for. Especially because of the bond.”

I watched his face carefully. His eyes strained a little, but otherwise he kept his trademark smirk. “Yep, I guess that solves a lot of our problems.”

“I’m not mad at you, you know. Not for creating it, anyway,” I added. “I’m a little upset that you shut me out, but you had your reasons.”

“I―” Gabriel began. I gripped his forearm.

“You don’t have to explain yourself to me, Gabe,” I said softly.

He smiled gently. “Yeah, I do. You deserve an explanation. I didn’t want to overwhelm you after you just got back. The bond can be...intense.”

“You’re still blocking part of it, aren’t you,” I realized. “I can handle it, Gabriel. I want to feel it.” I waited expectantly, refusing to back down.

He raised an eyebrow, then closed his eyes. The steady tone in the back of my head―and how had I not noticed it before now?―grew louder, carrying emotions and a _presence_ within its notes. Fondness, joy, admiration, and pure _love_ flooded my being, leaving me gasping beneath the onslaught. I was acutely aware of Gabriel holding me upright, of the inhuman heat radiating from him. _His Grace_ , I realized. _This is what his Grace feels like._

“You okay?” Gabe murmured. I nodded, still shaky. This was entirely new territory for me.

_How new_? Gabe projected curiously.

I skittered back slightly, not sure how he would see my inexperience. He managed to catch enough, though.

_You’ve never even been_ kissed? He sounded genuinely shocked.

_I’m not exactly popular with most of my peers, let alone guys. And I’ve never really felt the inclination to do anything sexual before._ I tried to play it off as inconsequential.

_Before? You do now?_ Some of the Trickster slyness threaded through Gabe’s mental voice.

_Guess I just needed to meet the right person_ , I whispered in the privacy of our minds.

* * *

 

When we got back, Luce was squaring off against Michael, the Winchesters and Cas looking on bemusedly. I crossed my arms.

“Really, you two? I thought we were past this,” I said, looking pointedly between the angels.

Luce ignored me. “He’s done nothing wrong, Michael! If our Father could accept me back, why not him?”

Clearly we missed something. I turned to Gabriel for support. He shrugged helplessly, snapping a Mars Bar into existence.

“I know that, Lucifer,” Michael growled. “But that doesn’t mean―”

“Excuse me,” I cut in. “Explanation for those of us that just arrived, please?”

“Castiel is still banned from Heaven,” Luce said quickly, glaring venomously at Michael.

I blinked. “What? _Why_? He deserves to go back after everything you put him through.”

“It’s not that simple―” Michael tried.

“I’m sorry, I was under the impression that you are currently in charge up there. Obviously, I’m behind the times. God resurrected him, that should make him pretty damn untouchable, don’t you think?” I stared at Michael, trying to keep my face blank and my voice even. From the slightly unnerved and scared look in the eldest archangel’s eyes, I was succeeding.

“No, of course, I just―”

“Just _what_?”

“...Need to make sure the rest of Heaven knows that?”

I smiled grimly. “Good idea.”

Michael vanished. Dean snorted. “Are all angels terrified of you?”

“Yes,” came the stereo response from the celestial beings in the room. I gaped.

“Oh, come on. They’re much more terrified of Denise and Abby,” I pointed out.

“Perhaps. But that does not mean that they do not fear you,” Castiel said. I deflated slightly.

“I don’t want them to fear me...except for Zachariah and a couple other dicks, like Metatron―”

“ _Metatron_?” I waved Luce away absently.

“Marathon. Anyway, they shouldn’t have to fear me; we should be able to coexist without trying to kill each other all the time.” I leaned against Gabriel, letting him hold me up.

Luce grimaced, understanding perfectly. He changed the topic. “What marathon?”

“A _Supernatural_ one, apparently,” Gabriel informed him gleefully. I elbowed him before he could elaborate. I did not want the Winchesters finding out about this. At least not right now.

“We need to head back anyway. Denise is expecting me to be where she left me.” I grabbed Luce before anyone could argue, following that uncomfortable tugging back to my couch. Denise stood in front of us, her arms folded. Balthazar was behind her, smirking.

“Rhiannon, we’ve talked about this. No going off on your own, especially to other universes.” Denise reproached. I winced.

“Yeah, I know. Sorry. I was sort of summoned to the pagan convention.”

“Summoned to the―no, never mind, I don’t even want to know.” Denise dropped her head into her hands with a groan. I shrugged helplessly.

“Sorry. So, who’s up for a _Supernatural_ marathon? We should call Abby too,” I mused. Denise stared at me in horror.

“You introduced them to _Supernatural_? Are you _nuts_? That’s violating every rule of time that you could possibly imagine!”

“Not really. Only if you’re following the Whovian model, and even then it’s wibbly-wobbly, timey-wimey. Besides, we are changing things, so it’s not necessarily their future anymore, right?” I grinned brightly at her, already fiddling with the remote.

She scowled. “Trust you to make a logical argument as to why the universe won’t implode if we do this. Are you letting the Winchesters watch it, too?”

“I’m not _that_ crazy. And I think it would be more all of reality as opposed to just this universe, seeing as we’ve been jumping across so often.” I glared at the Blu-ray player as it informed me that Netflix was ‘unavailable.’ “It damn well _better_ be available, you insignificant, worthless hunk of shit,” I muttered darkly at it, restarting the stupid thing.

Denise sniggered. “You should just upgrade,” she pointed out. I frowned again.

“Don’t feel like it―finally!” I leaned back, Gabriel and Luce on either side of me. Glaring at each other. Over my head. Again.

“If you two don’t watch this in peace, I’m showing the one where you die first.” I smirked internally as both angels became very interested in the television screen. Balthazar and Denise settled on the other end of the L couch.

“Which one are you thinking?” she asked, smirking slightly. She was accepting the humorous side of things instead of contemplating the likelihood impending doom, at least.

“Tall Tales? I figured we start with those and segue into fourth season, since the first three aren’t all that interesting plot-wise compared to the rest. When’s Abby going to get here?”

“I thought you were texting her?” Denise said, exasperated.

“I was...kinda. Maybe we should just‒”

Gabriel snapped his fingers.

“I was at practice,” Abby said mildly. “I have responsibilities, Rhiannon.”

“It was Gabriel, actually,” Luce chipped in quickly. “If you need to go back…”

“No, it’s done now,” Abby sighed. “Why am I here, anyway?”

“Rhiannon thought it would be a good idea to have a _Supernatural_ marathon,” Denise explained wearily.

“Okay then. What are we starting with?” she asked, squishing between Denise and Luce.

I pointed to the screen, clicking the remote. “Tall Tales.”

“Really, darling?”

“Hey, it’s a good episode!”

“Which has absolutely nothing to do with Gabriel, right?” Denise slid in slyly.

I sulked as the title clips came on. “I hate you all.”


	11. Chapter 11

“This is very strange, watching the Winchesters’ lives on a television screen,” Luce remarked as the pranks were shown. “This is how you knew so much, correct?”

“I may, possibly, be a little obsessed,” I admitted. Denise and Abby snorted.

“Only a little?” Abby said dryly.

“Shut up during the show guys,” I cut in as the old guy came on the screen. Gabriel leaned forward abruptly.

“Hey, I remember him!” He frowned at the girl, watching them walk into the building.

“Yes, we’re aware. No talking,” Denise growled, not looking away from the show.

We watched in morbid fascination as the girl’s skin rotted and the professor backed towards the window in horror. The Trickster locked the doors, Luce making an incredulous noise as his face was revealed. The professor fell onto the stone steps, the Trickster never breaking character.

“Really, Gabriel? This is what you left Heaven for?” he asked distastefully.

“No, I left Heaven because you and Michael wouldn’t stop fighting,” Gabriel snapped. “I was just trying to do my job, albeit a little differently―”

“You won’t get to watch it if you keep talking,” I threatened. They shut up.

The rest of the episode passed in relative silence. Balthazar made one off-hand comment before quailing under our fierce glares. Most of the time was spent laughing at the Trickster’s antics, the angels more relaxed than I had ever seen them. By the time the end credits rolled, I was tucked into Gabriel’s side, his arm flung around my shoulders. Luce had slouched back into the cushions, Abby perched on the edge in sharp contrast. Denise sat next to her, Balthazar’s arm stretched along the back of the couch in the typical “I’m-just-casually-putting-my-arm-here-it-has-nothing-to-do-with-you” way that every boy managed to make unbearably awkward and amusing.

“What happens when the rest of Heaven finds out about this?” Denise asked out of the blue.

“I really don’t want to think about it,” I grimaced. “I think it might be better not to give them ideas. We should just distract them with another fandom.”

“Did you have one in mind?” Abby asked, stealing the remote and flicking through the episode list. “Because letting them watch―”

“Doctor Who,” I said slowly, a grin spreading over my face. They paused.

“What?” Denise frowned at me. “That might not be―”

“A bad idea,” Abby grinned. “I like this plan.”

“We’re going to distract the Host with Doctor Who?” Denise asked sceptically.

“It’ll keep them entertained, at least,” I offered mildly. “Just show them Blink first.”

“You are so sadistic,” Abby groaned.

“What’s Doctor Who?” Luce leaned forward curiously. I looked pleadingly at my friends.

“You said we were marathoning Supernatural. No changing your mind,” Denise scolded.

“But―”

“No.”

“I just―”

“No.”

I sulked. “Fine.”

Abby pressed play. I glanced at Gabriel. “Abby, I totally approve of anything you do to him.”

“Thanks, love,” she said distractedly as Mystery Spot lit up the screen. Gabriel paled.

“You’re just throwing me to the wolves?” He asked plaintively. I looked at him incredulously.

“Dude, if Abby didn’t have dibs, I would personally steal all your candy and make you unable to eat any sugar for this,” I said heatedly. Gabriel blanched and curled slightly in on himself.

I turned smugly back to the television, settling in to watch the rest of episode. Gabriel vanished halfway through, probably due to Abby’s increasingly whitening knuckles. Luce went to fetch him just before the fourth season started, glaring at him when he tried to protest.

There was some squeeing when Cas made his appearance, much to the amusement of the angels. Uriel wasn’t nearly as well received. Abby had started yelling at the screen at one point, the rest of us alternatively joining in or laughing. The noise masked the door opening.

“I thought you weren’t going to throw parties while we’re out,” my mom teased. I yelped and scrambled for the remote. My sister laughed.

“Do I get to threaten your boyfriend?” she asked, far too gleefully.

“No, you―it’s not like―just go away, we were fine before you showed up,” I sulked.

My mom laughed. “Your dad and I are going to look for a new screen door. Denise, keep an eye on them, will you?”

“Sure, Mom,” she grinned, rolling her eyes when Imogen sat down in my lap. I grunted as her sharp tailbone dug into my stomach.

"Why am I your new seat?" I grunted.

"Because I love you that much," she said, grinning savagely at the archangels on either side of me. I swatted at her.

“Leave them alone,” I scolded. “Look, we’re watching television. Last episode of season four, and then we’ll make dinner.”

“You aren’t cooking,” the other girls said immediately. I pouted.

“I can cook!”

“Yes, but usually people want food besides pasta or frozen pizza,” Lucifer chipped in, smirking at my wounded look.

“Yeah, alright, let’s all gang up on Rhiannon,” I grumbled. “We should do a con thing soon.”

“It’s bad enough you’re introducing them to the fandom, Rhiannon,” Denise scolded. “Don’t traumatise them.”

“Hey, what did you tell my parents?” I asked suddenly, ignoring Lucifer Rising. “They took the angels awfully well.”

“Yeah, they kind of showed up and explained their part in it while you were sleeping. Then Death showed up, and I’m pretty sure they’re just dismissing it as one of your fandom things,” Abby explained, focusing back on the screen. “How did Ruby even escape in this, anyway?”

I shrugged. “Near as I can tell, Lilith possessed her so that Dean would be able to spill her blood. She did the same thing before during the whole hellhound debacle―I really want one of those by the way―and ‘the righteous man that begins it must end it.’ The Seals, not the Apocalypse itself.”

“You spend way too much time thinking about this,” Imogen laughed. I rolled my eyes.

“What are you doing for your birthday?” Denise asked. Lucifer pouted at everyone ignoring his debut, before turning to me curiously.

“I dunno, go see Thor: the Dark World?” I mused. “I’m not one for big parties, and it premieres on my birthday, so it works.”

“Who are you inviting?” Denise asked, stealing the remote and turning off the television.

“You two, Emily, Alyssa and Emma―Maci―, one of my sophomore friends called Anna,” I listed. “I think that’s about it.”

“We don’t get to go?” The archangels were staring at me in wounded horror.

“Er…” I stalled, glancing helplessly at my friends. They smirked at me and retreated to the kitchen with my sister, the traitors.

“Well, if nothing else exciting is going to happen, I’ll just be going,” Balthazar drawled. He vanished without another word, leaving me to deal with the other angels.

“Look, we’ll sort something out,” I said, throwing my hands up exasperatedly. “If you really want to spend an evening with seven hormonal teenage girls―”

“Maybe we’ll just steal you for another birthday celebration,” Lucifer mused, looking far too mischievous for anyone’s comfort.

“As long as her original plans aren’t disrupted,” Denise threatened. “You should respect her wishes, guys; it is her birthday.”

“She’s also right here,” I said tiredly. “What’s for dinner?”

“Food,” Imogen called from the kitchen. I scowled.

“Yes, that’s very helpful, thank you!” I shouted petulantly. They laughed at me, and I smiled despite myself.

_This is how a family should be_ , I thought fondly, watching my girls and angels tease each other. _And it’s mine._


	12. Chapter 12

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a timestamp of the birthday party, written by one of my friends for this story, over on FF.net. Same title, it will be chapter 12 there if you want to read it.

“Come on, Rhiannon!” the Devil whined. “Your human friends threw you a birthday party!”

“Why do angels care about birthdays?” I asked sceptically. “I’m refusing any presents from Raphael or Zachariah or any other suspicious angels, by the way. On the grounds that I think they’ll probably try to kill me.”

“We don’t usually,” Gabriel told me, smirking at my rant. “But you’re the baby of the family, even if you are an archangel. Plus, you were human before.”

I stared at him, thankful I was already sitting on my couch. “When did I become an archangel?” My eyes narrowed. “ _Baby_?”

“You’re the new toy everyone wants to play with,” Luce said, annoyed. “And you technically were an archangel the moment you said Yes. You just sort of...came into your own when we separated.”

“I wonder when you’ll appear in the Good Book,” Gabe said, still smirking. I paled.

“Please tell me you’re joking.”

“You don’t have to see all the angels,” Luce said quickly. “But some of the younger ones want to meet you, and afterwards we can go to the hunter’s house.”

I groaned. “I’m not getting out of this, am I?”

“Nope!” Gabriel’s grin split his face.

“Fantastic.” Despite myself, my lips curved at the thought of baby angels. Denise and Abby would be pissed that they missed it. Actually everyone would be pissed. I had promised my other friends that they would have a chance to...interact with the Supernatural universe, but beyond the initial meetings, nothing had happened.

“Rhiannon,” Luce said, poking me. “Stop stalling.”

“I’m not stalling,” I huffed. Gabe rolled his eyes and tugged me close. He was respecting my inexperience and taking our relationship slowly, in an unusual show of sensitivity; at least, unusual according to Dean.

I let him snap us away, Luce following closely. I was determined to hold on to this peace for a little while longer.

* * *

 

“I don’t know how you do it,” Michael remarked as we found him in the archangel’s Office. “The younger angels are so difficult to deal with.”

I rolled my eyes. “They’re in awe of you, and they want your attention―just like all younger siblings.” Luce and Gabe went to attend their duties as I settled across from the eldest angel.

“They’re soldiers―”

“They’re _family_ , Michael,” I cut him off. “And what Heaven really needs right now is to be reminded of that.”

“Perhaps,” Michael conceded. I rolled my eyes. Again.

“Why did you want to see me?”

“Father has gone back to Earth,” he told me. “His wish was that the archangels restore Heaven and the Host. All of the archangels.”

I blinked at him. “Wait―”

“Congratulations,” Michael said smugly. “You have received your own Office, and are in charge of Hell, Heaven, and Earth...relations.”

“ _What_?” My shriek drew the attention of several angels. “I can’t do that! It’s bad enough I’m an archangel at all! I’m not a leader, Michael.”

“Nevertheless, Father thinks you are the best qualified. He’s given you some titles―look, you’ve even got a church.” The archangel was enjoying this, the bastard.

“I’m going to kill Him,” I snarled. “I don’t care if He created the universe, I’m going to kill Him.”

“No, you’re not,” Michael said patiently, already turning back to his paperwork. “Your space is that way,” he added, pointing out the door.

I glared and stormed out.

Heaven didn’t really have poles and alignments, per say, as it existed on a different plane than the rest of the universe. Still the archangels’ Offices corresponded with the four cardinal directions on a compass, with God’s throne at the centre. Or at least, they used to.

God’s space was still in the middle, but the Offices had moved to the points of a pentagram. At the pinnacle, an unused one stood proudly. The sight of it, combined with who I found once I’d entered, made me want to kill God all over again.

“You have _got_ to be kidding me.”

Zachariah’s lips thinned. “Unfortunately not,” he gritted out.

I threw my hands up in the air. “Get out. I refuse to work with you. It’s bad enough I have to work here; I’m going to pick my own damn employees, and to Hell with everyone else’s opinions.”

The other angel scowled at my blasphemy―like I cared―and strode out without speaking to me. I looked around helplessly and flew to the garrison halls. Trying to be as unobtrusive as possible, I wandered around, not sure what I was looking for.

“Hael, we’ve had this discussion.” An exasperated voice caught my attention. I peered around the corner.

“Until your garrison leader decides you are ready, I cannot assign you an Earth post. I’m sorry, but that is the rule,” Naomi sighed, looking at the young angel sympathetically. Hael looked crestfallen as she left, and I immediately wanted to help her.

“You know,” I mused, startling Naomi. “Maybe we should organize field trips or something. Get angels familiar with Earth and humans before they’re actually assigned. It would help with actual interaction, as I’m sure Castiel could tell you.”

“Rhiannon,” the other angel breathed, scrambling to attention. I waved her down hastily, wrinkling my nose.

“I don’t stand on ceremony, and I certainly don’t want others doing it to me unless I’m pissed at them for doing something stupid. Have you done anything stupid?” I was teasing, but the stricken look on Naomi’s face made me reconsider.

“Relax. I was kidding,” I sighed. “We need to work on this place’s sense of humor.”

“Archangel―”

“Rhiannon.”

“Rhiannon,” Naomi corrected herself. “What can I do for you?”

“What is your job, Naomi?”

She looked startled again, probably because I knew her name. “I...I oversee certain garrisons. Their leaders tell me when a member is ready for active duty, I assign them a post, and any indiscretions that aren’t handled internally are dealt with here. Of course, I am only one cog in the machine. If my superior decides I am not doing my job correctly, punishment will be given appropriately.”

“Who is your superior?” I asked, already focusing on the work I would have to do here. Michael hadn’t given me any more instruction than ‘Deal with PR,’ so I was floundering.

I was also regretting firing Zachariah so quickly, even if he was a dick.

“Zachariah is. Was. He…” She trailed off, clearly uncomfortable. I nodded. I had some idea.

“Do you like your job?”

She hesitated. “It is a worthwhile service to Heaven.”

“That’s not what I asked, Naomi,” I said gently. “I’m not going to get you in trouble or anything. I want to know how you feel about your work, that’s all.”

“It’s…” Naomi struggled, clearly unused to the freedom of speech. “It is satisfactory.”

“But?”

“But I wish I was able to do more,” Naomi blurted, instantly appearing stunned at her audacity.

“More for the garrisons?”

“More for the interactions between Earth and Heaven,” she rushed out. Now that she knew I wasn’t trying to trick her, the angel was taking advantage of the interview.

Not that I had been planning on interviewing anyone.

“We are guardians for our mortal cousins, and we’ve lost sight of that. I’d like to help bring that back.” I nodded slowly.

“Who’s your superior now?”

“With all the reorganization in Heaven, I suppose it would be...Castiel. Father has promoted him to Zachariah’s level, and since he has no official job position…”

“He would inherit it,” I finished, pleased. This might not be as difficult as I feared. “Thank you, Naomi.”

“Of course,” she said.

I flew to Earth, pausing for a moment to find Castiel’s Grace before alighting at Bobby’s. “Cas, can I talk to you?” I ignored the guns that were once again pointing at me.

“Of course,” the angel said, tilting his head and following me outside. “What do you need?”

“Were you aware that you inherited Zachariah’s position?” I skipped pleasantries, watching Castiel carefully.

“No,” he said, bewildered. “When?”

“My guess is when you were restored to Grace. You were promoted, in every sense of the word.” I leaned against a junker. “Are you going back?”

“I…” He looked back at the house, conflict raging inside, if not showing in his expression.

“I’m apparently in charge of PR in Heaven―meaning how we interact with Hell and Earth,” I added at his confused head tilt. “Since I have no doubt the Winchesters are far from finished where Heavenly matters are concerned, we will most likely need a liaison.” Castiel’s eyes widened as he realized what I was saying. “Any recommendations for your replacement?”

“Anael,” Cas said instantly. “She was a good garrison leader, and has the experience and mindset for the changes ahead.”

I smiled. “Thanks, Cas. Do you mind if I come to you for advice?”

“Not at all,” he said, clearly thrown. “But why?”

“Why you? Or why would I need advice?” I asked dryly. “I’m still new at this. And despite what Luce and Gabe might think, they still follow Heaven’s old ways. It’s all they remember. You have a unique perspective, and the benefit of not being too close to the problem.”

“I see,” Cas said slowly. “Good luck.”

I snorted. “Yeah. I’m going to need more than luck, I think.”

I hugged him (getting a panicked look in return) and returned to the garrisons. It didn’t take me long to find Anna―mostly because everyone was gathered around her fight with Zachariah.

“The old regime didn’t _work_ , Zachariah! That’s why we need to change,” Anna hissed.

Zachariah went purple, which was odd since we didn’t even need vessels up here. “This is extreme, even for you, Anael. It’s no surprise, considering you fell, but―”

“How long have they been arguing?” I whispered to Hael. She jumped and made a little _hhh_ sound, but otherwise didn’t give away what was happening.

“Only a few minutes,” she whispered back, glancing oddly at me. “Zachariah doesn’t think Anael’s fit to be a garrison leader, and she―well,” the young angel broke off in embarrassment.

“Called him a couple names?” I offered. Hael grimaced in agreement.

“That’s putting it lightly. We didn’t think Zachariah would be back here after his...promotion.”

I raised my eyebrows. “Why do you say it like it’s a bad thing? He’s moving up in the world.”

“His boss doesn’t like him all that much,” she muttered, still frowning at me. “The archangels were discussing what to do with him.”

“Huh,” I said, peering at the bickering angels again. Anael looked particularly murderous. “Guess somebody should stop this.”

Hael grasped my arm, terrified when I moved forward. I patted her hand and smiled warmly at her, not stopping.

“Guys, seriously? You’re scaring the kids,” I called, shoving my way between them. “Zach. What are you doing here?”

The older angel looked torn between yelling at all of us and breaking down in tears. “My job.”

“You don’t have a job right now,” I told him. “Castiel was given your position by God, who then passed it on to Anael.” I turned to her. “Congrats, by the way.” I pointed at the fuming Seraph. “Leave. I’ll decide what to do with you later.”

I waited until he flew off before resuming my conversation. “While I’m sure this was entertaining for you all, I’m also pretty sure you all have places to be.” The area emptied faster than a demon running from a Winchester. “Anael, I’d like to speak with you about your new job.”

“Of course, Arch―”

“ _Rhiannon_. I’m going to have to do something about the ceremony thing,” I muttered, walking towards the large office in the centre of the halls. “You were right. Things need to change. This is the first step of that.”

“Telling off Zachariah?”

“Putting people in charge that I know can make angels into what they’re supposed to be.”

“Which is?”

“Exactly what you are,” I said, sitting down and gesturing for Anna to do the same behind the big desk. “Asking questions. Taking initiative. Doing what they think is best. Communicating. The old regime didn’t work for a reason, and if we don’t take care of the core issues, it won’t matter what else we try to change.”

“And all the archangels agree with you?” Anna fidgeted slightly, staring at me sceptically.

I shrugged. “They didn’t give me much of a choice. Michael basically shooed me away from his Office with the instruction to ‘Handle PR.’ He only has himself to blame if he doesn’t like my methods. Luce and Gabe don’t care, and I think Raphael is just avoiding me.”

“You are taking advantage of the loopholes,” Anna said slowly. I grinned.

“It’s not my fault Michael left so many open.”

“So what do you want me to do?”

“What you think is best,” I said. “I mean it. I’m a little confused in all of this as well, but as far as I can tell, I’m supervising all things related to Hell and Earth. If I don’t understand what you’re doing, or why you’re doing it, I’ll ask. However, unless something catastrophic happens, I’m going to trust your judgement. There’s just one favor I’d like.”

“Of course.”

“Can I have Naomi?”

Anna blinked at me.

“Zachariah was...either my PA or my secretary, I’m not sure which. I think Gabriel and Lucifer were pranking him. Or me. Anyhow, I wasn’t going to work with him, so I need a replacement. I think Naomi needs something like this. She’s been working hard, and hasn’t got much back for her effort.”

I watched Anna expectantly. Any other angel would have just given an archangel what they wanted, no questions. Unless it was Zachariah, who would have tried to refuse just to spite me.

“And who do you think should replace her?” Anna met my gaze without flinching, making me grin.

“It’s up to you, of course. If you actually want my opinion, however, I’d say Rachel. She has a good head on her shoulders, she’s loyal, and she’s not afraid to do what’s right―even if it means going against orders or friends.” Anna nodded, and I stood. “Good luck. I hope we can talk to each other.”

“I think we can work something out,” the other angel said, shaking my hand. I huffed and pulled her into a hug. She squeaked lightly.

“I’ll see you around, Anna. Maybe we can do lunch sometime.”

“I’d like that,” she smiled. I walked back to Naomi’s room, happy that I had made at least another ally, if not a friend, in Heaven.

 


	13. Chapter 13

“Naomi?”

The angel jumped, still unused to being casual with an archangel. “Yes, Rhiannon?”

“Would you like to come work for me?” I asked. “As a...PA, I guess, instead of your current job. I need the help, and you expressed interest in increasing your involvement.”

She peered at me closely. “You have no idea what you’re doing, do you?”

“Not a clue,” I said cheerfully. “Which is where you come in. I don’t know how often I’m going to be around, but I do know that I have no patience for the red tape and bureaucratic bullshit. You know your way around the politics, and how to deal with insufferable angels.”

“Are you leaving?” Naomi’s eyes widened.

“Not immediately, and not for good,” I reassured her. “However, I need someone to handle things on a day-to-day basis, as well as in my absence.” I shrugged sheepishly. “It’s how Hell works.”

Naomi nodded. “Very well.”

“What, just like that?” I asked. She smirked faintly.

“Yes. You made several good points, and this is what I asked for.” She tilted her head. “I assume there is a replacement arriving soon?”

“I suggested Rachel to Anna,” I offered. “But I don’t know if she actually took me seriously.”

“She would be hard pressed not to,” Naomi pointed out. “You brought the archangels back together and stopped the Apocalypse. Anything you have to say will be considered of the utmost importance by any angel.”

I stared at her. “Please tell me you’re joking.”

“You are the Saviour of the Host,” Naomi told me, a little confused. “Why would they not?”

“Saviour of the Host,” I repeated blankly. “Death is too kind. I’m so pranking God for the next century.”

Naomi looked worried. She probably had a legitimate reason.

***

“So, you know your way around better than I do,” I said nervously, fidgeting in my Office. “Anything special I need to do?”

Naomi glanced at me, smiling slightly. She gradually relaxed, becoming more comfortable around me. “Most angel wear a sign of their Office, at least in Heaven.”

I folded my arms. “I’m not wearing anything stupid.”

“Of course not,” she placated. “You can wear it or not, and of course you can choose what it is. Usually, it’s a suit or some other uniform, though Raphael carries a staff.”

“Huh. So, I have to go shopping, basically. Find something inherently me.” I grimaced. “Lovely.”

“You don’t have to―” she started.

“Yeah, I do,” I sighed. “Every angel has a uniform. Seriously, don’t you guys ever change your clothes? Or do you just have copies hidden away in a TARDIS closet?”

Naomi frowned. “What is a TARDIS?”

I grinned. “I’m going to make every angel watch Doctor Who. Starting with _Blink_. We can make a marathon weekend out of it.”

Naomi sighed. I had the sneaking suspicion that our relationship was going to turn into the other angel doing her level best to censor any ‘disturbing’ activity. Probably for the benefit of the Cupids.

When she wasn’t trying to kill people in a tyrannical delusion of grandeur, Naomi wasn’t all that bad.

I left her in the front, allowing her to get settled without me breathing down her neck. For a moment, I stood helplessly in the middle of my Office and looked around. It was styled like a plain business executive’s space. There was a large wooden desk, leather blotter matching the swivel chair behind it. A sleek desktop computer and keyboard was plugged into thin air on the left side of the desk, though most of the tabletop was covered in books.

A large tome sat in the centre, a journal on top. Other books were scattered in stacks around the room, seemingly disorganized. A post-it was stuck to the journal, bearing an elegant font that seemed computerized, though I knew better.

_Thought these would help._

_We’re here for you._

_L and G_

I smiled softly and sat down. The tome beneath the journal appeared to be the largest and the most extensive record of Heaven’s rules, protocols, and traditions. I stared at it in faint disgust, dreading actually having to read it. I supposed that was what the notebook was for; recording the relevant sections in a quick guide. Though, I should probably keep the books for future reference. I just needed a place to store them properly.

Bookshelves replaced my walls. I eyed them suspiciously, and with more than a hint of wariness. Was this some twisted celestial version of the Room of Requirement?

I sighed and began to look through the books. They appeared to be mostly sorted already; all I needed to do was organize them on the shelves.

It took me half an hour.  This was not how I envisioned spending my morning.

“Where’s Zachariah?”

I turned and scowled at Lucifer, not missing the barely-there smirk. “Very funny. I haven’t decided what to do with him yet. At first I thought about making him liaison with Hell, but that’s cruel and unusual punishment, even for them.”

Gabe snorted and slid past Luce over to me. Wrapping his arms around my waist, he nuzzled the side of my neck. I raised my eyebrows and sent him a flash of amused exasperation, but didn’t push him away. Luce rolled his eyes at us.

“Stop working; we’re going to your party,” he scolded.

“What kind of work are you doing, bro?” Gabe teased, waggling his eyebrows obnoxiously. I smacked his arm lightly.

“Leave him alone. And I was just putting away all the books you dumped in my room. Hardly work,” I said.

“We figured you wouldn’t keep Zach very long, and only a few angels know the ins and outs of upper echelon politics,” Gabe explained. “He used to be Michael’s Second, and now he doesn’t have a place.”

“I think we can figure something out,” I muttered. “Exactly who is coming to this party, guys?”

Luce shrugged. “Your demons, a few hunters, us.”

“First of all, they’re not my demons,” I grumbled. Seriously, why did everyone insist on calling out of character supernatural creatures mine? “Also, do the hunters all know what is going on?”

“If you mean know about the whole Apocalypse fiasco and the following events, then yes, the Winchesters and Singer have informed the Harvelles,” Gabre assured me.

“The Harvelles are there?” I asked, allowing Gabriel to transport the both of us. My flight skills were still a little shaky.

“And a cop, apparently,” Lucifer said, gesturing to the Sheriff patrol car in Bobby’s front lot.

“Don’t get arrested,” I said immediately. Both angels pouted at me, mock wounded expressions eerily similar. “I mean it; I refuse to bail you out. In fact, I’ll help.”

“Kinky,” Gabe smirked. I rolled my eyes and ducked away from his arms, bounding up the porch steps.

“Would you prefer it if I just left you tied up all night?” Gabriel stopped dead, mouth dropping open and his eyes glazing over. I shivered as a bolt of lust shot through our bond. Luce looked between us before wrinkling his nose and stepping inside. I snorted at his reaction and followed, Gabe snapping out of his daydream seconds later.

Lucifer stood in the centre of  Bobby’s living room, the hunters either pointing guns or playing with knives, Castiel hovering like he wasn’t sure he should interfere. The two demons stood in the corner opposite the humans, avoiding the Kurdish demon killing knife. Jody Mills stood in the kitchen doorway, apparently wishing she’d brought her own gun.

“Wow, guys,” I drawled. “This is an awesome party. You really know how to make a girl feel special.”

“So you’re the famous Rhiannon I keep hearing about,” Jody said. “Good to finally put a face to the name.”

“All good things, I hope,” I said nervously. Just because I’d been casual and blunt with everyone else in this universe so far didn’t mean I had to be rude to everyone I met.

“Well, anyone who can keep Bobby Singer and his friends out of trouble is all right in my book,” Jody offered, grinning warmly at me. I smiled back in relief.

“Fantastic,” Ellen interrupted brusquely. “We’re getting back to cooking. No sneaking dessert, for anyone, and we’ll do presents after lunch.”

“Wait, you don’t have to―” I started.

“Shuddup, you idjit,” Bobby snapped. “We kind of owe you anyway.”

I flinched slightly; that was not an acceptable reason for doing all this. Gabriel wrapped himself around me again, reassuring me physically and mentally. Hunters, according to the Trickster archangel, were emotionally stunted, crass, and more often than not acted before they thought.

_Right_ , I thought. _And that’s different from angels how, exactly?_

He huffed laughter into my skin, sending another shiver through my body. The smirk curving against my shoulder let me know that Gabe’s actions were far from accidental. Or innocent.

“Behave,” I whispered, hardly able to contain my own laughter.

“Get a room, you two,” Dean complained.

“We already have a room,” I retorted. “It’s not our fault other people are in it.”

“He’s just jealous cause he doesn’t have anyone to snuggle with,” Jo quipped. I chuckled.

“I’m pretty sure Cas would help him with that if he asked,” I said, detaching myself from Gabe and sitting on the couch. Jo followed me, both of us ignoring Dean’s sputtering.

“So, what have you and your mom been up to?” I asked, unsure if Jo would actually want me prying.

She shrugged. “We’re trying to set up another Roadhouse, for the most part. Now that the Apocalypse has stopped, monsters and demons have quieted down, so we’re letting other hunters pick up the slack.”

“Guys, are we really going to talk about work  now?” Sam asked, carefully staying away from Lucifer, who was leaning in the hall doorway.

“It’s not work, it’s me asking how she’s doing after everything that’s happened,” I told him indignantly. “That’s called sensitivity.”

“Yeah, Sam.” Jo nodded, trying not to laugh.

“Food’s ready,” Jody called, sticking her head through the door.

“Finally,” Bobby grouched.

“I hope you didn’t put salt on our portions,” Meg muttered, glaring at the spread.

“Why?” Jody asked. She clearly hadn’t been briefed―at least, not on the identities of the guests.

“Salt allergy,” I supplied. “Meg and Crowley are the only ones who have it, but we still have to be careful,” I added, casting pointed glances around the room. I didn’t trust anyone not to slip a poison into someone else’s food. The hunters pouted, but no one made any sudden moves, so I assumed the message was received. The angels would have to be watched more closely, though.

Then again, it wouldn’t be a proper party until people started attacking each other.

* * *

 

“Alright, present time!” Jo said, bouncing excitedly on the couch. We had migrated back to the living room, pleasantly full―even the ones who didn’t need to eat.

I blinked at her. “Wait, you guys were serious about that?”

Jody rolled her eyes and grabbed her jacket. “I’m gonna hit the road. Can’t leave the boys at the station alone too long; who knows what they’ll do,” she joked. “Happy Birthday, Rhiannon.”

“Er, right,” I mumbled, staring around in befuddlement. I was sandwiched between my archangels, Jo squished against the armrest by Lucifer. Ellen stood behind her, eyes boring into Luce’s back. Bobby sat at his desk, Sam and Dean flanking him. Castiel leaned against the wall next to Dean, Crowley giving them―and the Devil’s Traps―a wide berth. Meg had disappeared somewhere.

“Okay, who goes first?” Jo asked brightly. She seemed more excited about this than me.

Cas shifted uncomfortably and stepped forward. He awkwardly held out a bag, looking like the truly young angel he was for once. “I did not know what you would like,” he rumbled. “Your friends helped.”

I took it slowly and stared at it for a moment. My friends―I assumed he meant my human ones―helping could mean anything from a gift card to something horribly embarrassing and prank-esque. I was a little scared to open it, but Castiel’s hopeful face couldn’t be disappointed.

_Thank stars_ , I thought when I opened it (I certainly wasn’t thanking God; he hadn’t had a say). Inside was almost every variety of foreign chocolate available. I peered up at him.

“Did you buy the entire Global Foods candy aisle?” I asked. He blushed heavily, and I laughed. “I love it, Cas. Thank you, really.” He smiled in relief, and my own grew at his adorableness. And Dean’s jealous scowl.

Although, knowing the Winchester, he probably didn’t know he was jealous in the first place.

“Here,” he grumbled, tossing a package covered in newspaper at my head. I was barely able to catch it, glaring at him. He shrugged and I tore into the present without much regard for the wrapping. Ashes drifted to the floor as I shook out the lilac T-shirt.

Gabriel broke down in hysterics as he read it, Lucifer letting his head fall back with a groan as I gleefully read it aloud. “ _On the day I was born, the Devil woke in a cold sweat and said, “Oh crap, she’s here!”_ Seriously, Dean? Where did you even find this?”

He shrugged again, grinning. Luce looked at it resignedly. Jo snorted and pulled a huge cardboard box from behind her seat.

“Tell me that isn’t a weapon,” I said, mild horror rising at the thought of what a box that big could contain. Jo rolled her eyes.

“It’s not a weapon,” she repeated flatly, before the glint returned to her eyes. “Unless you want to use it against guys.”

Luce and Gabe went tense beside me, eyeing the gift with trepidation. Ellen snorted. “It’s from both of us. Go on, open it up.”

I pulled on the flaps, snapping the tape and brushing tissue paper aside. Gaping, I pulled the clothes out and draped them over my legs. They had gotten me a complete outfit; the black shirt had capped sleeves and laced up the back, pairing nicely with the fitted red leather jacket and fingerless leather motorcycle gloves. The leather pencil pants would tuck perfectly into the heeled boots. I swallowed heavily, running my fingers over the clothes. I didn’t want to think about what this must have cost them, especially after just losing everything…

“From what we’ve seen of angels,” Jo said, catching my attention. “They have an unofficial personal uniform. Figured we’d save you the trouble of going shopping.”

“Thank you,” I whispered hoarsely, blushing when my eyes watered. “Thank―this is just what I needed. Thank you.”

“It’s nothing,” Ellen dismissed. I knew it wasn’t nothing, but I didn’t push.

“Here,” Luce said, pulling an angel blade out of his jacket. “Father and I forged it, and since it’s your birthday and you need one anyway…”He trailed off, watching as I ran my fingers over it. Light flashed off the edges, mesmerising me.

“Awesome,” I breathed. Blades had always been my preference over guns, though I liked any handheld weapon well enough. But still, to have my own angel blade...it felt like acceptance into the family―true acceptance, not just tolerance. It felt like _home_.

“Great,” Bobby huffed. “Satan gives her a sharp shiny weapon and makes the rest of us look like idjits. Thanks for that.”

“I didn’t mean―” I instantly began.

“Oh, hush,” Bobby said. “Just open it.” He handed me a very book-shaped present, shooting me the same fondly exasperated look he often gave the Winchesters. I nodded and carefully undid the wrapping, exposing an extremely old tome on...Purgatory? From what I could make out in the title, at least.

“Figured it can’t hurt to be prepared,” Bobby said gruffly. I grinned at him.

“I suppose you’ll want a translated copy?”

“Would you?” His eyes widened in innocent surprise. The man would have done well in Slytherin. I laughed and nodded, attention shifting to Sam when he handed me a folder. My brow furrowed as I leafed through the papers, not quite understanding.

“They’re...well,” he rubbed the back of his neck nervously. “They’re transcripts and records, even a bachelor’s degree, and they’ll stand up to inspection, so―”

His breath choked off as I tackled him. I was grinning wildly, gratefulness swelling in my chest until I felt like my heart would stop. “Thank you, thank you, thank you―”

“Rhia,” Sam croaked out. “Air. Humans like it.”

I blushed again and scrambled off him, tugging him to his feet. “Sorry.”

He wheezed out a laugh, shaking his head. “Don’t be. I’m glad you like it. This way, you can do what you need to in this universe.”

“Rhia?” Gabe broke in, speaking for the first time since the gift giving started. His voice sounded a little strange, and I shot him a confused look.

“Well, yeah,” Sam said, shrugging. “Her name’s too long, and it’s not the worst nickname.”

“I like it,” Jo pronounced, Luce nodding beside her. The elder hunters tilted their heads in agreement, while Cas seemed not to care either way. Dean was muttering about “Luciannon,” Crowley smirking at him. Gabe was...pouting? And Meg was back from her errand, finally.

“This is from both of us,” she said, gesturing to herself and Crowley. “He was the runt of the pack.” She carefully pulled a small bundle out of her jacket, handing him over to me. Crowley was saying something about drowning, and Cas glared at him, but I was entirely absorbed with the puppy hellhound in my arms.

“Hello, gorgeous,” I breathed, smiling softly at the tiny yawn that revealed thorn sharp teeth. Settling back on the couch, I clutched the puppy tighter as he squirmed slightly. “Hey, it’s okay; Mommy’s got you, Dante.”

“Dante?” Dean snickered.

“You’ve got to admit, it’s appropriate,” I retorted.

“How can we see him?” Sam asked, ever the nerd.

“Hellhounds are trained specifically for hunting down souls,” Crowley explained. “Invisibility is one of those qualities. Obviously, the mutt―Dante,” he corrected hastily at my glare, “won’t be used for quite the same purpose, but he still needs training.”

“I can help with that,” Meg put in. “I was one of the Hound Masters back in the Pit; the best, some say.”

“Clearly those demons were brain damaged on the rack,” Crowley snarked.

“He looks more like a wolf,” Jo observed. “Or a husky. Not what I expected.”

“Hellhounds originated in Heaven,” Gabriel said mildly. The humans and I gaped at him. “The rogue ones, the ones that turned savage, were sent to Hell. Dante looks more like a randilyall than a Hellhound.”

“I’m going to pretend that made sense and take your word for it,” I told him, mock seriously. Dante licked at my chin, whining as my attention split.

“Dude, you’re competing with a dog,” Dean snickered. Gabe pouted again, watching Jo and Luce rub Dante’s ears as I held him.

“Yeah, well,” Gabe sighed melodramatically. “My present’s just as good; I just can’t give it with an audience.”

“ _Gabriel_!” I shouted, flushing.

“What?” He innocently raised his eyebrows at Luce’s slightly murderous face. “I didn’t mean it like _that_ , guys; sheesh, get your minds out of the gutter.”

Despite myself, I was a little disappointed. Judging from Gabriel’s suddenly darkened eyes, my feelings had broadcasted across the bond loud and clear.

He shook himself lightly, breaking eye contact. I focused on rubbing Dante’s belly, not entirely sure what had passed between us. Ellen and Bobby had moved into the kitchen, talking quietly and possibly flirting, in their own blunt way. Sam and Dean had grabbed beers for themselves and Jo, since Gabriel and Crowley refused to drink anything but expensive scotch or whiskey, and Luce and I refused to drink period. Meg had left, saying there was a small demon uprising she needed to take care of. Crowley followed shortly after, promising to keep me updated. I grimaced at that, the others laughing at me. Luce and Gabe didn’t move from my side, and Jo left us to keep the boys company.

“So,” I said, somewhat sleepy now that all the excitement had passed. “What now?”

Gabriel snorted. “Well, I still have to give you my gift.”

I eyed him. “Right. That’s not a frightening idea at all.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“There are others who want to give you gifts as well,” Luce cut in quickly. _Trickster_ , I thought at Gabriel, making sure he knew I was just teasing him. “I’m sure over the next few days you will be bombarded with well-wishers.”

“Why do you say that like it’s a good thing?” I asked morosely. Gabriel grinned and tugged me upwards. I swayed into him, a little dizzy from the sudden change in altitude.

“I’ve got you, sweetheart,” Gabe murmured. “And your gifts.”

“M’kay.” I lifted my head and peered at the clock. Ten thirty, much longer than I normally stayed up. “Goodnight, everyone. Thank you again,” I called. A chorus of ‘you’re welcome’s and ‘goodnight’s accompanied the beats of Gabriel’s wings.

I lifted my head from Gabe’s shoulder, frowning blearily at the room. Even in the dark, I knew this wasn’t mine. Dante whined in my arms.

“Gabe—”

“Full explanations in the morning,” he promised. “Right now you need sleep.”

I sighed and lay back on the bed, tugging Gabriel down with me. He shifted to avoid crushing the puppy, peering at me suspiciously.

“You can stay if you behave,” I mumbled, already drifting. The puppy curled between us, snuffling at the pillow. Gabe carefully draped an arm over my waist, making sure he wasn’t crossing any boundaries. I hummed and burrowed deeper into his chest. Faintly, I felt the kiss pressed to my hair, lulling me to sleep. Thinking could wait till morning.

* * *

 

Morning turned out to be around seven o’clock. Gabe grumbled and rolled over, pulling a pillow over his head to muffle my chuckles. The Messenger of God was not an early riser.

Dante tumbled out from under the blankets, racing ahead of me. I assumed this was Gabriel’s house, though I’d thought he conjured a temporary place in whatever town he was in at the time.

I paused and stared at the puddle on the stairs. Whether mortal, hellhound, randilyall, or unidentified, it seemed that a puppy would always act like a puppy. I cleared it away quickly.

“Dante!” I hissed. He careened around the corner, skidding into my legs. “You can’t do that again,” I scolded. “Relieve yourself outside, not inside.”

His ears drooped, intelligent enough to understand what I was saying. At least, I hoped he could. I picked him up and nuzzled his nose, smiling at his sneeze.

“You’re cheating,” Gabe pouted. I gasped and glared over my shoulder at the angel.

“At what?” I protested.

“You jumped my big unveiling,” he said. “It’s no fun when you see it beforehand.”

“You lost me,” I frowned at him, taking Dante into the kitchen.

“Your present,” Gabriel said, gesturing expansively around us.

“My what?” It took me a moment to catch on. “You’re giving me a _house_?”

“Yup!” He beamed. “Okay, so your friends kind of helped, but most of it was me.” Gabriel faltered ever so slightly. “You like it?”

I let Dante scramble out of my arms, turning in a slow circle. It was an odd mix between sleekly modern and elegant Gothic styled architecture; strangely pleasing instead of disorienting. Light streamed in through the stained glass windows, still unable to illuminate the eaves of the living room. It was expensive (or would be, if anyone had paid for it), beautiful, and very much reflected my own personality and preferences.

That wasn’t why I liked it.

Two quick steps brought me into Gabriel’s space. His hands caught at my waist as mine fisted in his hair, dragging him down. It was sloppy and uncoordinated, but it was the first kiss I’d had with anyone.

Most people would have described fireworks, or music, or feelings of floating. But most people were human.

This… this was so much more intense than any human could stand. The bond flared white-hot, Grace reaching out to each other. On a physical level, it wasn’t anywhere near a great kiss by anyone’s standards; maybe not even a good one. On a metaphysical level, it was the closest I had been to someone, even Lucifer. With the bond exposed, raw sensations and emotions and thoughts entwined, binding our souls tightly atom by atom. Even vessels and angels didn’t mesh this fully.

“I love it,” I breathed into Gabriel, not willing to pull away any time soon.

He groaned as my phone rang, rolling his eyes at the ‘Heat of the Moment’ lyrics. I answered it, refusing to move from Gabe’s embrace. He ducked his head and pressed kisses into my skin in revenge.

“Hello?” Yeah, I was pissed. I had actually been having fun for once, and someone had the nerve to interrupt me.

“Rhiannon, you know we have school today, right?”

I cursed and pinched Gabe’s side, focusing on Denise. “Yeah, about that. I’m not going anymore. Technically, I graduated, and I have better things to do and I’ll talk to you later, okay?” Thumbing the power button, I dropped the mobile on a nearby table and leaned back to look at the archangel accusingly.

“What?” He grinned, eyes crinkling. I raised my eyebrows.

“You know very well what,” I said. “You just don’t care.”

“I’ve got a beautiful woman in my arms,” Gabe charmed. “How am I supposed to resist? Of course I don’t give a shit.”

I snorted and kissed him again, this one shorter and not as intense as the previous. “I’m going to go check in with my family, and then you can show me around. We can even hang out with Denise and the others at lunch. Sound good?”

The former Trickster sighed melodramatically. “Do I have to share?”

“Yes.” I swatted at him. “Play nice.”

“You sure?” he leered. “What if I’ve been a bad boy?”

“Then I’ll have to come up with a suitable punishment,” I said casually, swallowing at the near-demon black his eyes had turned. I smirked at him and tugged at the threads of reality, flying away before he could respond.

Life, for the moment, was very sweet indeed.

 


	14. Chapter 14

“Does anyone want to prank the UN with me?” I asked. Denise and Rachel snorted while the rest of the table stared at us. Gabriel had joined us for lunch at first, only to leave halfway through for ‘business.’

“Rhiannon, you can’t prank the UN,” Elise said patiently.

“Of course she can, she’s an archangel of the Lord,” Rachel said promptly.

“What were you planning?” Denise asked me, ever the sensible one.

“I’m going to appear in the middle of a major meeting and do the angelic equivalent of flashing.”

“Who are you flashing?” Gabe squawked from behind us.

Denise fell off the bench, the rest managing to stay seated despite their laughing. I hastened to explain.

“Angelic version; flashing my wings at UN members,” I told him.

“I think that’s technically illegal,” he frowned.

“And running around as a Trickster for millennia isn’t?”

Gabe scowled at Rachel. I grabbed his arm , redirecting his attention. “Hey, Michael said I’m in charge of Heaven-Earth relations―”

“Within reason, Rhiannon,” he snapped. “You can’t just do whatever you want and use that as an excuse!”

My eyes narrowed and I tugged him out of the school. We reappeared in the house, and I quickly stepped away.

“I’m not excusing anything,” I began coldly. “I’m not fooling around; this world is far too important to me. I have a plan, this is just a fun way to start.”

“Did you run it by Michael first?” Gabriel asked, crossing his arms and keeping his face neutral.

“I wasn’t aware I needed his permission,” I said cooly. “Besides, what good would that have done? Do you ask him how to do your job?”

“That’s different,” he muttered.

“ _How?_ How is that different?”

“We know what we’re doing!” Gabriel burst out. “You’re still new, and this naive attitude is going to screw things up for everyone!”

“Get out.”

He blinked. “What?”

“Get. Out. Of my house,” I repeated, forcing myself not to punch him. “I don’t want to see another archangel for a very long time. Now, do your job and pass the message on, will you?” I sneered at him.

He left without another word. I sagged back against the wall, pillowing my head on my arms. Dante wriggled between my stomach and thighs, pushing his wet nose under my chin.

Shit, this was such a mess.

* * *

 

Naomi showed up not fifteen minutes later, though any other angels kept their distance. She held out a laptop, rolling her eyes when I stared at it blankly.

“So you don’t have to spend a lot of time in Heaven,” she explained. “A human soul called Ash helped create the interface.”

“Okay,” I said slowly. “Why?”

“Word of your...disagreement with Gabriel spread quickly. Those of us who approve of the changes you’re trying to make are running interference.”

“Thanks,” I told her. “Just...don’t get caught. Or start a rebellion. That would be bad.”

“Of course,” she said, returning to Heaven moments later. I slung the leather strap of my bag over my shoulder, shoving the laptop inside. Whistling for Dante, I grunted when he barreled into my legs. Supernatural dog that he was, Dante was already stronger that a puppy of his size should logically be. Although, he was growing quickly. I hadn’t noticed before, too caught up in…other problems, but he’d gained a few inches and at least two pounds since last night. At this rate, he’d be fully grown in a couple of weeks.

Briefly, I debated going back to school, but my friends would be back in class by now. Showing up at Bobby’s house would raise too many unwanted questions, especially if Castiel had already caught wind of what happened.

On the other hand, I really didn’t want to stay in the house right now.

Dante licked my nose, squirming when I refused to put him down. I huffed fondly at him, shifting the puppy so he was sprawled across my shoulders. He blinked at me, then stuck his nose in my ear. I jerked my head away and reached around to steady him. I didn’t know what happened to hellhounds that fell off while angels flew, but I wasn’t especially eager to find out.

I carefully searched out Crowley’s aura, noting that he was in his Earth-side office with a couple other demons, before looking for Meg. Her aura was muted, but appeared in the middle of Wyoming. The Devil’s gate, I realized, and flew into Hell.

Or tried, rather. I ended up a couple miles from Kripke Hollow with a headache and sore wings. Since they weren’t on the same plane as the rest of my body, it was very disorienting. I scowled and flew to Crowley’s office instead, not caring who else was there.

It turned out to be just a couple of low-level demons, who squeaked and quickly excused themselves. Crowley eyed me warily and poured two glasses of some high-end scotch, holding one out to me. I waved it away and pulled out a pack of Buttons Cas had gotten me instead, flopping into the chair in front of Crowley’s desk.

“I want to restart the Apocalypse,” I grumbled. The demon raised an eyebrow amusedly.

“I assume you didn’t mean that declaration seriously,” he said, drinking both glasses.

“It’s a wonder they managed to get anything done, considering the way they argue,” I sighed. “Also, I need to learn how to get into Hell so I don’t strangle the archangels.”

“You don’t already know?” he asked, surprised for some reason.

“I’m kind of winging it here,” I told him, exasperated.

“That was a terrible pun.”

“There was a pun?”

Crowley rolled his eyes and changed the subject. “So I have to teach an archangel how to fly into Hell?”

“Right now, I need a neutral place to work,” I muttered. “And I’m considering a vacation to explore alternate realities,” I sighed. “Lessons later, when I don’t feel like killing things on sight.”

“Generally not a bad thing where we’re concerned, love,”Crowley pointed out. At my glare he hastily backtracked. “Partner? Boss? No?”

“Why can’t people just use my name?” I asked tiredly.

“No idea, Rhia,” Crowley said cheerfully.

I scowled at him.

He smirked back.

“I just came to give you a heads up,” I told the King, standing and stretching my wings in preparation for flight.

“Heads up for what?” Crowley eyed me warily, with admittedly good reason.

“God gave me the Office and position of an archangel,” I said grimly. “If He doesn’t like what I’m doing, He can tell me Himself. Otherwise, the other archs can go screw themselves.”

“You’re avoiding the question,” Crowley said.

“Yes, I am. Spoilers!” I added, leaving before he could respond, curses ringing in my ears.

* * *

 

I dropped back by my house, deciding to go through my possessions and figuring out what I wanted to keep. Some things I would use in the future, others I could give away or sell. I looked through the closet, bagging the clothes I hated and never wore. Those that had sentimental value but were rarely used, such as the ‘Band Buddy’ shirt, went in a separate box. Only my favorite outfits would come with me; I could replenish the rest of my wardrobe with ‘appropriate’ clothes.

Read: the Harvelles would most likely convince Naomi and Anna to go on a shopping trip. They were all entirely too interested in the way I dressed myself.

In the end, the pile of things I was keeping looked pitifully small next to the discarded bags. I made a quick trip to the house, not dwelling on the empty feeling pervading the place. I jumped at my text notification, Lucifer’s voice echoing through the rooms.

_Are you still planning on pranking the UN?_ I paused before sending Denise an answer. I could care less what the arches thought of my actions, but dragging my friends along with me was another story.

_Is it just you?_

_Abby and Joy have homework, but Rachel’s more than willing._

_Are you both at home?_

_I am. Rachel should be._

I stuffed my phone back into my pocket. The leather pants only held it because they had been mojoed. Admittedly, the outfit seemed badass, but I felt like an idiot.

Hopefully, the Grace wouldn’t blind anybody. Or no one would get shot. Maybe the fragile humans should stay out of the line of fire until things had calmed down. Ash could set up a live video feed; hack into the cameras.

Denise jumped when I appeared next to her. I ignored her sputtering at the sudden transport and collected Abby and Joy anyway. Sitting on Rachel’s bed and letting her field the questions, I pulled out my laptop. Rachel shunted her cat off the bed and the girls crowded around me, peering over my shoulders.

I opened an instant messenger server. The logo was unfamiliar, but it was clearly meant to communicate with other planes of existence. _Ash, you there?_

_’Sup, bi-atch?_

_Don’t call me that. Can you set up a live video to this laptop from the camera feeds at...wherever the UN is meeting for the next fifteen minutes?_

_Of course. Can I ask why?_

_Prank._

_Awesome. Is that what’s got the archangels’ feathers all ruffled?_

I squinted at the screen, pretending not to see the looks my friends were giving me. _...How mad are they, exactly?_

_Mike and Raphael are the most pissed off, Luce is worried, and Gabe is depressed._

I squashed down the guilt. _Let them watch the vid then. Hopefully it will clear things up._

_You got it, sweetheart._ I winced at the nickname, but let Ash sign off with no reprimand.

“So we aren’t going to go with you?” Rachel asked, sounding offended. Denise and Abby looked at me with large, hurt eyes, and Joy stole my laptop.

“Guys, I’m about to mysteriously break into a UN session, bring a rude supernatural wakening about, and attempt diplomacy. You guys are squishy; bullets will hurt,” I tried to explain.

“And you’re not?” I shrugged at them. They frowned at me.

“Fine,” Denise said suddenly, grabbing the laptop away from Joy. “Go have fun, don’t hurt yourself, be back in time for tea.”

I snorted and hugged them, laughing when Rachel pushed me off the bed. Tugging nervously at the bottom of my jacket, I smiled shakily and took off. Slowly.

Every representative jumped out of their seat and started shouting in their native language. I scowled at the sudden headache. Angels weren’t supposed to get headaches.

The yelling didn’t cover the click of released safety switches on a hundred guns. I raised my eyebrows and turned in a small circle. The ambassadors seemed to be under the impression that security could handle any threat I posed.

Adorable.

The noise was getting a little annoying now. I really hoped this went as planned.

Slowly, careful not to let any of my actual Grace escape, I stretched my wings out. Bulbs shattered, light throwing impossible shadows against the walls. Feathers brushed the ceiling, screams strangling into whimpers and prayers. Half the room was kneeling.

I rolled my eyes. They were acting as if I was a well-known angel or something.

“Seriously?” The afterimage faded. No one appeared to notice.

“Who are you?” The thick southern European accent belonged to a tall, wide man with arrogant shoulders.

“Rhiannon,” I replied simply.

“Then you can’t be an angel!” the American rep shouted triumphantly. “That name never appears in―”

“The Bible is a bunch of crap,” I told them irritably. “It gets more wrong than right because, like the rest of the holy scriptures, it’s written by humans.” They stared at me. “And I’m an archangel,” I added. “God wasn’t happy with the simple ascension, nooo, He had to go the whole nine yards.”

The half of the room still kneeling looked close to tears. Or insanity. Or both. The rest just looked lost.

I took pity on them. “Guys, relax. I’m just here to talk about the rest of the supernatural world.”

“You mean demons?” a French woman squeaked.

“Demons, monsters; anything that kills humans,” I corrected cheerfully. “Not that you really have to worry about it, technically. There are people who hunt them.”

“So why are you telling us in the first place?” The British rep had recovered quickly. Not only had she accepted it, but she also kept her wits about her.

“I figured I might as well be polite and semilegal about this.” I shrugged, a tad sheepishly. “Hunters are often persecuted and unprotected from misunderstanding civilians―law enforcement included, yes―because while they save lives, they tend to break laws doing it. What I want from you is assistance in creating an international paramilitary group, sanctioned by the UN to use whatever means necessary to stop creatures from killing.”

This was the risky part. The reverence wouldn’t be enough to convince them; I had to pitch this right.

“What’s in it for us?” the arrogant European man asked suspiciously.

“Not dying,” I deadpanned. The guy bristled at the perceived threat.

“You do understand that we can’t commit to anything without talking over with our governments, yes?” the French woman interrupted quickly.

“I would expect nothing less,” I told her. “But I had to get the ball rolling somehow, right?”

Unexpectedly, the conference room dissolved around me and Heaven rematerialized in its place. Michael fumed in front of me, doing his level best to intimidate me while Raphael loomed behind him. Gabriel and Lucifer were curiously absent.

“You know, I have a phone,” I said mildly. Raphael’s eyes narrowed to slits. Michael took a threatening step toward me. I raised my eyebrows, trying to appear unfazed.

Of course the angels weren’t going to like it. They were used to a system developed over aeons. But I had to assume that God wanted me to change things, and working with hunters was the first step to that.

“How dare you?” Michael hissed. “Do you have any idea what you’ve started?”

“Shakespeare in the Park?”

“You insolent little―” Raphael kind of sounded like a kettle now.

“Go screw yourself, Raphael,” I snapped. “I’m not going to be a part of your testosterone-fueled pissing contest, so glare at someone else, okay?”

Michael tried to loom menacingly. It didn’t work.

“Look,” I gritted out. “I know you don’t like it, and this is probably not your ideal solution. But at least this way people are marginally safer.”

“And what about us?” Michael’s shout drew the attention of several angels nearby, more gathering with each second. “What happens if the humans turn on us? What is your plan then, _Archangel_?” He sneered the last word at me, and I flinched back from the venomous burn of it.

“The lives of angels didn’t seem to concern you during Apocalypse season,” I snarled. Instantly, I knew that was too far. Michael’s face, the spitting image of a young John Winchester, twisted in an ugly scowl.

Very quickly, my attention narrowed to the migraine-like agony radiating from my left eye and the weird not-ground of Heaven grinding into my back. My lashes were glued together by drops of blood.

Complete silence rarely fell in Heaven, but no one even breathed now. They were waiting, I realised. Waiting to see how I react, because I had become a well-known fact that I did not take anyone’s shit, and I fought back with all my power.

Except I wasn’t going to fight them. The angels had had enough inner fighting to last the rest of time, and attacking Michael would only encourage more. And to be honest, I was tired.

They were aeons old beings, and I was not a babysitter.

“Michael,” I started, letting the anger drain out of my voice and posture. “When you’ve decided to grow up, send me an email. Until then, Naomi's in charge of my business in Heaven. Have fun.”

I would drop by Chuck’s place, let Him know what was going on. His issues with His family were half-resolved at best. Maybe I could spend time in my own world doing things I probably shouldn’t. Maybe I could prank the Supernatural cast or do a con thing―

So caught up in my thoughts, I wasn’t able to dodge the second blow.

 


	15. Chapter 15

I jerked back, unable to hold in a scream as the blade tore out of my shoulder. Squinting through my right eye, the haze of pain almost obscured Zachariah’s irritated smirk. The Grace of the archangels pressed against me and I twisted away. The not-ground began to crumble as darkness seeped into my vision.

“Rhia!” Gabriel sounded terrified, and Lucifer looked murderous. I glanced down at Earth, noticing the conveniently placed Roadhouse. I aimed carefully, swaying a bit, and then let myself fall out of Heaven’s reach.

This was not going to be fun.

* * *

 

I landed on a pile of wood. Jo came swinging out the door, sawed-off shotgun clutched tightly to her chest. She froze in shock when I staggered to my feet, and I winced. Between the blood and Grace pouring from my shoulder and the state of my face, I must have looked a mess.

“Don’t suppose you could spare a Band-Aid?” My voice cracked, and I cringed in embarrassment.

“What _happened_ to you?” she gaped. The door banged against the wall as Ellen came to investigate the fuss. The saloon owner immediately went into mother-henning mode.

“Long story. I’m gonna pass out now, okay?” Even if it was for just a few hours, at least I would get some reprieve.

Apparently, I didn’t deserve even an hour’s rest, as the Winchesters and Cas arrived shortly. Pure coincidence, I’m sure. Of course, Castiel had tuned into Angel Radio and knew all about the Incident. He was explaining it irately explaining it to the hunters when I woke up.

“Castiel,” I groaned. “ _Shut up_. Where’s my phone?”

“The archangels―”

“Can go to Hell,” I interrupted testily. “Phone. Now. Gimme.” The plan to get vertical was stopped by my shoulder reminding me that it did not approve of moving and would exact vengeance if attempted again.

Did the Harvelles give me painkillers?

“We were able to stitch up the flesh wound, but there’s not much we can do for the...other part,” Jo said softly. Ellen moved my phone out of the way when I tried to grab it.

“Zachariah has been dealt with,” Cas ground out. I wondered why he sounded so upset about it―unless he wanted a crack at the older angel.

“What happened to him?” Dean asked, morbidly eager.

“Does it matter? And can I please have my phone?” I asked irritably.

“Who are you going to be calling?” Sam looked suspicious. Dean and Cas were having eyesex.

“My _friends_. And maybe Chuck.” My hand hovered expectantly, and the youngest Winchester reluctantly passed me the device. I dialed, ignoring Sam’s hovering. He was probably hoping I called Abby. Ellen shooed her daughter and the boys out, narrow-eyed glare warning me not to move or else.

“Hello, this is Viviene,” Denise’s voice echoed out of the speaker.

“You―what?” I did not need anymore complications today.

“I’m going to change my name. Dropping Denise, keeping Viviene, getting another middle name. What do you think?”

“I don’t want to think. It hurts too much,” I grumbled.

I could almost hear the raised eyebrows. “What did you do this time?”

“Nothing!” Skeptical silence. “It was Zachariah’s fault!”

“Rhia,” she warned. “I’m putting you on speakerphone.”

“Look, I’m mostly okay, but if the archangels come asking after me, don’t tell them anything, okay? I’m sort of on the run from Heaven. I guess. I don’t even know. Don’t ask me questions!”

Abby promptly ignored me. “What do you mean, _mostly okay_? Were you hurt? Did _they_ hurt you?”

Suddenly, I could picture Abby and the rest pulling various improvised weapons from their backpacks and storming Heaven. Which...probably wouldn’t end well.

“ _Listen_. I’m just a little banged up, and I’m handling it. Just promise you won’t give me away?”

There was a long period of silence, and then Viviene sighed. “Fine. Don’t do anything stupid, okay?”

“Yeah, yeah,” I said, relieved. “I’m just going to hang around Vancouver, okay?”

“Do we have to define stupid for you?” Abby asked indignantly.

“No, it’s fine. Seriously, guys―hey, did the UN come to a decision?”

“They said they were going to fact check it, and then get back and organize things with you,” Rachel replied. “Keep us in the loop, okay?”

“And bring us back souvenirs!” Joy added. I chuckled weakly.

“Yeah, okay. Talk to you guys in a bit,” I said, hanging up. Sam had left the room at some point, and I carefully tried to adjust my dressings. Surprisingly, the pain had ebbed a little. I had no doubt it would scar at the least, but it would probably heal faster than humanly possible. Until it did, I could hang out at the Roadhouse, or crash at one of my friends’ houses. Then...I would go from there.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, this is going on temporary hiatus, at least until the summer. I have finals and AP tests coming up, so this won't get much attention. This also might be wrapping up soon, as I'm running out of ideas. If you guys want to see anything in particular (events from canon, crossovers, verse-specific prompts), feel free to shoot me a message. I might make a timestamp/outtake/AU-possibilities thing, you never know. Thank you all for being so patient and supporting me; love you all!


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